| There are times when life is stranger than fiction. You simply couldn't make this up if you tried. And I'm at a point where I no longer know if I should be deeply hurt or bloody furious. Over the years I have watched churches do some deplorable things but a few years ago a local church group did the totally unexpected. Having purchased horses to use in a "dude" program they found them cost inefficient, so they let them starve through an entire winter. In the spring, when my mother was in Ruidoso staying with me, the church phoned me and asked if I would sell all 13 horses for them. When we went to see the horses we were met with a horrifying sight. 13 emaciated horses. I knew all of these horses and had worked with them an entire year, but I could hardly recognize them. Anger just couldn't cover what my mother and I felt. I tend not to be vocal, and I am fairly passive, so it's often hard to see how upset I am. But my mother with her strong Yorkshire traits simply came unglued, and even I had some harsh words to say. We were thoroughly disgusted that people would walk into the front door of the church, walking distance from hungry horses, and not have one iota of conscience nor caring. Despite the fact that I was losing my own home I did as I agreed to do, I hauled in feed for these pitiful animals and I sold all 13 horses, and their tack, for the church group. Some weeks before my husband had returned to alcohol and drugs, and I had asked him to leave the home unless he signed himself into a rehabilitation center. He just happened to have been working on the building of a Christian camp for 12 months previous, so when he left 4 weeks prior to tax time I had the unfortunate job of approaching the owner of the Christian camp, an elder in the church, to ask for the earning statement I needed to file the joint taxes for the year. To say that my request was declined is putting it lightly. I limped away like a wounded animal to hide. It left a bitter taste in my mouth and I stopped attending that church - or any church. For my mother, an unbeliever, it was an infuriating Situation. She just couldn't understand what I was doing with these people or why I was involved with them at all. Fellowship didn't seem an appropriate answer to her. So when Huckins stole my mothers building fund I was already estranged from the church, having "crossed swords" with two of the largest denominations in Lincoln County, I was pretty hurt about the behavior I had seen and felt. My inherent desire to say nothing but go into hiding to lick my wounds was about ready to bite me harder than anything in life. Only one person knew that I had been deeply hurt, and that person represented herself to be the "fund raiser" even though that title also belonged to others. As her behavior became more erratic, threatening people, bullying, going from threats to syrupy sweet, my employer started to get more and more upset, at one point telling me to leave. He claimed that she went from house to house "getting into everyone's business" and I was encouraging her to get into his. I started to defend her but soon found myself on difficult ground. Then she started peeping through his windows and he put newspaper up trying to block her view, asking me to get some drapes that would prevent her from seeing into the living room. I did exactly what I normally do. I went into hiding terrified that she was going to lose me my job. Trying to protect my job, protect my boss, yet trying not have hard feelings while trying to distance myself from someone who had become harder and harder to deal with. When I suggested that we drop the idea of getting a roof on the barn, drying it in, and perhaps look for an old trailer to renovate I was told that "there was something wrong with my self esteem." When I drew a line and said, "enough is enough" I was told that I was mental. When she threatened to bring the health department in to harass my boss if he didn't give her $35k to build the house I said "enough is enough" so loud and clear I think it threw her for a loop. By that time she had wanted my medical records, had wanted contact with my husband and his family, had gone through my property records at the title company.. She had tried to give away my grand-children's ponies and couldn't understand why I couldn't take someone else's property. She wanted me to file not-for-profit to get money to build, and no amount of explaining seemed to make her understand that was illegal. She wanted me to build and sell it - but not tell anyone. It was twisting & distorting truths and coming up with one after another threat. She literally turned me into a nervous wreck at a time I was getting subpoena's served almost weekly. I had to put some distance between us if I was going to survive this because all I found myself doing was desperately and very unsuccessfully trying to do damage control. She promptly went to my boss and told him that she was dying. (Then later told me that she was joking.) Yet I never took into consideration the consequences even though when Susie Stockton and I drove to Carrizozo one day I made the comment, "I wouldn't want THIS woman as my enemy for the threats and behavior are unsettling me deeply. Wonderful one minute, spitting venom the next." Suzie had done everything within her power to find me help, and that brought in a THIRD church denomination. The denomination that sent an e-mail from one church group to another that was nothing short of the most extreme defamation of character I have ever read. The fact that it was 100% false - and was established as such seems not to matter, the fact that it did unbelievable harm not even a consideration. When the article was published in the September 8th newspaper correcting all the rumors and lies I expected a reaction because I was no longer willing to hide and lick my wounds. By afternoon of the 8th my miniature dachshund, my best friend of 5 years was laid dead. The only vehicle I could see or hear was being driven by the one person I knew that I didn't want as my enemy. I was inside Sonney's putting up the new curtains, to replace the newspaper, and I head a yelp. When I ran outside poor Oscar was just laid there, and I could hear the Polaris going back towards it's home. I was simply numb. So deeply hurt I couldn't even speak to Sonney or talk to anyone about my loss with the exception of my daughter, whom I phoned, and Suzie and George, whom I e-mailed. Yet, I didn't see the event. It left me in a strange place. Wondering but not knowing. Today I went to the trailer to do some work and it was "red tagged." All work has to stop on it because, I was told, I need an engineer and permits to replace the windows and put a new roof on an old trailer. I had never heard of anything so ludicrous in my life. A convicted felon built a 2,000 sq foot concrete barn over a period of 8 weeks, he had no permits, no building inspections - nothing. And not a soul bothered him. But I bring in a single wide trailer and replace two windows in it and I'm shut down by the very same government department that couldn't protect me from a licensed builder. Now, despite all the struggling, I can't even put a roof on the trailer to prevent more damage due to the constant rain. An inspector just "happened" to drive up from Las Cruces and just "happened" to see that we are renovating the trailer. Yet I didn't see the event. I have no idea if one of the numerous threats materialized or if it's coincidence. It's left me in a strange place. Wondering but not knowing. The "only" concrete proof I have that malicious intent, character assassination and deception is on-going is within that one e-mail - from one church group to another. So I contacted the Methodist Church to find out if they could lead me to their "source" of the infamous libel e-mail. The local pastor was wonderful, the Albuquerque headquarters were wonderful, but the head of our district hung up on me, refusing to speak to me no matter how polite I was, despite my pleading. He was simply horrible. What is the world coming to when you have to fight a church to get TRUTH? This time hell will freeze over before I go into hiding and lick my wounds. I'm tired of being hurt.. it's about time I tried being angry. | ||
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