During the night the weather is simply freezing, well dropping below 25 degree's. But the days are simply gorgeous. 60, sunny and comfortable. The tree's are brilliant golds, yellows and browns.
This is the Breeders Cup week-end. As a horsewoman who adores Thoroughbreds it simply pains me to see them race. It makes my heart sing when I hear the words, "He/She doesn't want to run." Going to the backstretch to pick up horses who have managed to come away from a race career sound in wind, limb and mind is a thrilling experience. When they are broken down you want to literally sit and cry. But no matter what, I believe that these regal animals deserve a chance to live a long life, to be loved, and cared for. They have been bred to be loyal with hearts as big as the outdoors. They are bred to give, and give in abundance. Thoroughbreds are the "Jewels" of the horse kingdom!
The fact that "Rough Sailing" had to be euthanized after a nasty fall didn't lessen my distaste for the sport of kings.
But once in a while you see a trainer who epitomizes the dogmatic determination of horsemen and woman and Carl O'Callaghan has certainly done that in fine fettle.
My ad. on Craigslist, the one that obviously caused the backhoe woman such upset, was taken down. I kept watching it wondering how long it would take for it to be flagged .. and almost died laughing when it disappeared.
Print kept using the phrase "control freak." But when someone has to manipulate and control everyone around them and can't stop, when any resistance to this level of control and domination means that you are now going to be destroyed by their viciousness, there is something seriously wrong.
I am so glad that I am a horse trainer and not a psychiatrist or psychologist because this one would take Sigmund Freud to understand.
When the *Dish tv company arrived yesterday to install the service for my boss we KNEW it was a matter of time before she saw that truck and would land on his doorstep. And sure enough there was no disappointment. At least there is one absolute in all of this mess.
The new curtains that my boss demanded that I buy and put up to stop her from peeping in through the curtains has worked. He no longer needs to put newspapers up at the windows for privacy.
It must be a bit of an inconvenience to have to walk up to someone's front door. Forget "Jersey Shore" we could have a fabulous reality show right here in Alto. I wonder if the county would consider changing the name of the street to "Coronation Street?" Ena Sharples you have met your match right here in America!
Mike returned to the barn sans machine and started shoveling dirt yesterday. Experience is a great teacher. Once you have tried to beg help bringing in a backhoe, bobcat or small tractor without success you realize that it's time to pick up the shovel. You have run out of options.
It's a tough choice to make because there is simply so much soil to put back. But it has to go back if the concrete barn footings are to be protected. I have not been to the barn so I have no idea how much more needs moving.. but in the front 1,000 sq foot we are ready to start raking the ground back to "level" status, and I hope Mike left the rear 1,000 square foot ready to rake too.
This is a strange world we live in. When people have backhoe's, bobcats and small tractors 1/2 a mile away but wouldn't even consider helping out, or if they do consider it they simply never show up.
The "it's not MY problem" mindset, the lack of community spirit ( unless there is money to steal) seems to be perfectly acceptable in Ruidoso, though it wasn't always so. I have friends who are so convinced that the American economy is still going to roll - that the "bad" economic is going to turn a whole lot worse, beyond anything we have ever witnessed. A few believe that we are going to end up in "survival" mode.
John truly believes that when you are in need of help you are perceived as weak even if you have shown strength. And weak people are preyed upon, not helped.
If so I guess this dog-eat-dog experience will serve me well. Yet I thank God for those who do care and did care just because they have caring hearts, not because of any personal glory or desire to control someone in a vulnerable position. I would have simply been destroyed after the house and barn building fund was stolen by Robert Huckins if not for a handful of people. There would have been no hope.. not one iota of hope.
There are times when I simply go into panic wondering how I am going to keep going. Trying to locate what is needed, trying to earn enough money. Trying to do all of this in a recession. Yesterday was one of those days. When everything started to snowball.
It's hard enough in this economy just trying to keep one's head above water. I have no idea how much my truck is going to cost to repair it - but it won't be cheap. And the more I start to put together the list of items I need to buy the more it seems like a mountain beyond my scope.
Then.. well, I have an anxiety attack.
There is a 2 horse stall sat on the ground and I told Mike to pick it up and take it for his horses. My boss had used it as a tractor shed for years but I have nowhere to put it, and he needs it far more than I need it. I'm struggling trying to get two buildings finished without having a third sat rotting on the ground.
I spoke to John and he has no idea if he is coming back to Ruidoso on Sunday. At least the trailer has been sealed to be more waterproof, so it's not the same as it was a week ago.
I just managed to come up with the $65 for the permit. By the time the permit has been returned to me Jesse should be back in Ruidoso and the roof ready to go on, but it looks like the Indian Summer weather may have turned by that time and a snow storm replacing the sunshine.
The autumn always gets me badly, as it breaks into colours. I want to go south, where there is no autumn, where the cold doesn't crouch over one like a snow-leopard waiting to pounce. - D.H. Lawrence
