I have not slept a wink all night. I kept trying to go to sleep and panic engulfed me. A late model truck left in Texas and no-one has the money to retrieve it. Homelessness I can't seem to resolve and everything else just left me in a state of sleepless panic.
It wasn't until 12 noon that I spoke to my daughter, who is going to get a loan on her old truck to finance going to get the new truck. This economy, and how it's making life so hard for my kids, is simply terrifying.
Last night gale force winds started up and it made being inside this shed hell on earth, and compounding everything a family of raccoon started destroying my boxes of belongings. By 6 am I could no longer keep my eyes open or find the energy to sit up, but sleep still wouldn't come, and the panic wouldn't go.
Clearly I have to lower my living expectations, just to stop myself from having a nervous breakdown.
I may have to chose between staying in a shed with raw sewage, wind, and wildlife coming through - or I may want to consider the latest in eco-friendly residences that need no building permits, or help to construct. I can enlist the help of my grand-children to make these, and they come with matching decor and accessories.
No stairs for my mother to worry about. You don't have to worry about cleaning.. just throw out the old and bring in the new. And here I have spent three years mortified that I couldn't get into a home ~ when the answer was so simple.
The winds are so bad that we have emergency warnings but I am so tired it's giving me an excuse to take a day off work and just... sleep.
The test of courage comes when we are in the minority. The test of tolerance comes when we are in the majority. ~- Ralph W. Sockman