Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Money Makes The World Go Round

The morning started out with Nancy Canning, another victim of Robert Huckins, contacting me to see if I could find a home for three Norwegian Fjords. I started phoning around at 7.30 am but I know what the answer is going to be. Few people are going to take on more mouths to feed in this economy. Not even the very frugal Norwegian Fjord. My last phone call was to Becky Washburn DVM, and I sent an e-mail to Nancy giving her a rescue phone number, before posting an announcement on Facebook for the Norwegian Fjords.

Trying to clear the flies in this shed has become an exercise in frustration. Last night it escalated from "hundreds" to perhaps a thousand or more. Everything was black, covered in flies. Walls, floors, clothes, bedding. I ended up sweeping up piles of dead flies while breathing toxic fly spray in a confined dark shed. To even think that this is how a woman lives after paying to have a home and barn built, is beyond any comprehension on a humanitarian level.All morning I rushed around trying to get errands done, and arrived back in Alto at noon. Within minutes the sky darkened, the temperature fell, and it rained for hours. Constant rain and dark skies. Water poured through the foundation of the shed and I grabbed the broom tying to keep my belongings safe from the mud and water.
A lull in the downpour gave me the time to start cleaning and oiling tack before going into the paddock to feed. I was amazed when a dozen deer came galloping towards the horse paddock, followed by 10 of the largest buck I have ever seen in this region.
You know the large bucks have arrived when Rio dives into the shed for protection.

Today I am pretty depressed and so easily fall into panic, anxiety and desperation. I can't get a home without our money, and can't keep fighting flies, mold, flood, frigid temperatures and dirty filthy living conditions. I have started to hate waking up each morning. Where is justice here?

The only thing left for me to do is to plead to the family members of Robert Huckins to intervene. If that be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. If you would be caring enough, and humane enough to do so, please make your brother, son, cousin return the entire building fund he stole from us so that I can buy a home. I simply can't go on homeless. It is already going into September 2011 and my nerves are in shambles after over 3 years of hell, that should never have been allowed. I am devastated at the loss of my mother, my career, my home and all I want is what we have paid honest money for - and I beg for your mercy.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.


That only a few, under any circumstances, protest against the injustice of long-established laws and customs, does not disprove the fact of the oppressions, while the satisfaction of the many, if real only proves their apathy and deeper degradation. ~ Elizabeth Cady Stanton

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Paid In Full

Today has been such a long day. I had an appointment at 8 am in Ruidoso, and even though I was awake at 5 am nursing a violent migraine I couldn't decrease the intensity of the migraine, or move faster than a sloth on librium. It poured down periodically in Ruidoso Downs and Ruidoso but was bone dry here. I managed to get through a rushed and hectic day and return to Alto in time to get "No-Name" ready for my boss to ride.

My boss rode this horse shortly after he arrived, when he shouldn't have had a saddle on him because he was in such poor condition. Then he never even laid eyes on the horse until yesterday.
At that time he was grinning from ear to ear seeing what had been a text book case of malnutrition, turn into a fully fleshed out horse, with pulled mane, healthy shining coat and polished hooves. Pretty enough to walk into a show ring. So today he had to ride again despite the threatening storm clouds.

It's a real thrill to see a fully fitted and healthy horse ready for conditioning when they have been allowed to lapse into such a poor state. But malnutrition seems to be becoming the "normal" in the horse industry. Earlier today my daughter had 2 bales of hay outside their paddocks. Within 30 minutes of been left there both had been stolen.

I am firmly convinced that we need a legitimate hay bank in Lincoln County. Most people in the horse industry would happily give someone a couple of bales of hay. It's sad when people resort to stealing. I have no idea what my daughter is going to feed the children's ponies tomorrow morning, but it won't be stolen. That is for sure.

The only thing left for me to do is to plead to the family members of Robert Huckins to intervene. If that be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. If you would be caring enough, and humane enough to do so, please make your brother, son, cousin return the entire building fund he stole from us so that I can buy a home. I simply can't go on homeless. It is already going into September 2011 and my nerves are in shambles after over 3 years of hell, that should never have been allowed. I am devastated at the loss of my mother, my career, my home and all I want is what we have paid honest money for - and I beg for your mercy.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.

It is very difficult for people to believe the simple fact that every persecutor was once a victim. Yet it should be very obvious that someone who was allowed to feel free and strong from childhood does not have the need to humiliate another person.~ Alice Miller

Monday, August 29, 2011

* A Frantic Homeless Woman's Guide *



To a nervous breakdown....

Yesterday was such a bad day, such a painful day, that by evening I counted it as an absolute loss. I'm sure that the weather was beautiful, yet I didn't see very much of it. Too ill to get out of bed during the daylight hours, and too stressed to sleep at night wasn't the recipe for fun.

I didn't wake up until after 9 am this morning, which is almost mid-day for me. And even then I woke up wound tighter than a drum, with my heart rate elevated, simply terrified about this unchanging state of homelessness in such dire economic times.
Jan telephoned to tell me the prices of the horses going through the Clovis sale Saturday and it was a heartbreaking situation. But the conversation, as usual, was the means and methods of surviving what could be total destruction. I asked her to pass a message to the electrician that I was really in a panic to get the utilities working on my land.

This has been a slow day, wondering when the rain is going to start falling. A short rainfall came after 4 pm ... but then the sun came out. The rest of the day has been focused on trying to get into a home, wondering what I have not tried in this painful odyssey.
When I came into the shed, because the rain started, I walked into hundreds of flies. This is just too much.

Panic and Anxiety seems to be the diet that is going to kill me. Though I truly try to keep going, hang onto what little I can grasp, even when depression & fear engulf me.


Webster say's:


Definition of STRESS
1
c : a physical, chemical, or emotional factor that causes bodily or mental tension and may be a factor in disease causation d : a state resulting from a stress; especially : one of bodily or mental tension resulting from factors that tend to alter an existent equilibrium stress.

Definition of ANXIETY
1
a : painful or apprehensive uneasiness of mind usually over an impending or anticipated ill b : fearful concern or interest.


Definition of CRUEL
1
: disposed to inflict pain or suffering : devoid of humane feelings cruel tyrant.


2
a : a cruel action b : inhuman treatment
3
: conduct held to endanger life or health or to cause mental suffering or fear


Definition of ABUSE
1
: a corrupt practice or custom
2
: improper or excessive use or treatment : misuse abuse;
3
obsolete : a deceitful act : deception
4
: language that condemns or vilifies usually unjustly, intemperately, and angrily
5
: physical maltreatment



Definition of ABUSIVE
1
: characterized by wrong or improper use or action; especially : corrupt ;abusive financial practices.
2
a : using harsh insulting language abusive crowd; b : characterized by or serving for abuse ;abusive language; c : physically injurious;abusive behavior.
abu·sive·ly adverb

I can't keep going on the same path Dorothy went on before she died, and I know it. This is simply killing me.

Written by Dorothy McKeevers daughters:
My mother was a victim of Bob Hutchins she worked her whole life to retire in Ruidoso when he cheated her of her dream. He took advantage of her kind heart her trust and she is left with an unfinished home - he walked away with well over 100K. We thought the safety measures were in place the bank 'WAS' to send an inspector for each draw he requested. He would bring an invoice to my mother who is sight impaired and tell her what he had done she would sign and submit to the bank. The bank would send an inspector and release the money to him. Reviewing the paperwork of work he claimed to have completed was fabricated and not even started but there on the bottom of the page was a signature from an inspector - a co-conspirator I can only suspect. She had to return to work in her 70's to pay for other contractors to make the house livable. My stomach turns when I go there and see the hardships she has had to endure and the conditions she has had to live in. I hope you get your due Mr. Huckins - you are a crook. My faith is only in the judicial system that they will successfully convict you and you spend you time behind bars.

****


I am also disgusted with Mr. Huckins...He left my mother with a half built house as stated by Judy Torres my sister. I blame him and the bank for distributing the monies to him when a full inspection was not completed properly. When I asked the bank for the names of the inspectors I was told they c
ould not disclose that information. I did have a signature but of course could not identify any of the letters. And it seems rather odd when all the monies were distributed to Bob the loan officer at the bank was transferred. My mother sits there with a half built house while he is still running around the town and not behind bars.
I doubt that anyone could ever try and say that this isn't abusive and cruel.

I have been asked to remove the name of one of the Huckin's family. But they would only give the name as "Anonymous" I'm a little perplexed at what to do. I have had contact with THREE family members either in person, via e-mail or on the telephone. (One member telephoned me ) If the person would like to contact me via my e-mail on this blog, and verify who he/she is, I will be only too happy to discuss this.

Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy.

I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins retu
rns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless.

Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen our building fund I wouldn't be making this plea today.

But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.

He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it. ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Necessity Is Pressing

From the time I woke up at sunrise until around 4 pm I was so ill all I could do was sleep and stagger around in pain. Even after 4 pm I felt so bad that I couldn't do much, but I managed to watch enough news to know that Hurricane Irene is causing substantial flooding, and quite a few deaths. It is still a huge blessing that it didn't materialize to be as destructive as it certainly could have been.

"No Name" is starting to bulk up like the Quarter Horse he is. He doesn't even look like the poor malnourished creature who arrived a few weeks ago. And the deer have become hilarious at feeding time. The very second I open the metal gate the clang of the bolt brings them running out from the pine tree's licking their lips as they run towards me. Between Rio, my two cats, the horse and a half dozen deer the scene at feeding time becomes worthy of "America's Funniest Home Video."

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

Since when do you have to agree with people to defend them from injustice?~ Lillian Hellman

Saturday, August 27, 2011

In A Nut Shell

You simply couldn't get any nicer weather than we are experiencing. Today I spent the day re-potting the houseplants for my boss, and.. trying to get clean sheets to sleep on.
As nice as it's been to have dry feet for a few days we still need more rain. I just wish the rain didn't bring such chaos in my own life, but more is in the forecast.
I can't believe that summer is almost over.

Hurricane Irene is now a tropical storm and is beating the east coast, but thank the Lord, not doing half as much damage as it had to potential to do. This has been nothing short of a miracle.

This is the last week at the racetrack. Many years ago the day after the track closed you could drive through Ruidoso and it was like a ghost town. If you passed a handful of vehicles in several miles it was rush hour. Today the population growth has enlarged to such a degree that doesn't happen anymore.
This is a stressful time for myself. I still have not heard from the electrician, so I have no idea what to think. The cold stark and uncomfortable reality is that I am going to face another winter homeless in this shed, and the mere prospect of going through this again is making me a nervous wreck. No-one could ever believe that this could happen. It's so surreal, and the fear is crippling me.

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.

I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home. Never look down on anybody unless you're helping him up.~ Jesse Jackson

Friday, August 26, 2011

Life Or Something Like It

2.50 am Friday morning and I am wide awake worrying. *Sigh* Sneezing with the start of a cold.
Yesterday was a simply gorgeous day and I had so much to do. Somehow I managed to drive 60 miles just running errands.

Thanks to the rain the land that was brown and dead suffering from severe drought has flourished turning a rich green. It feels so good to look around and see life come to barren land .. but it's too late in the year to provide an adequate food source for livestock and wildlife.

At Harvey's Feed Store I noticed all the new ad's showing massive liquidations of equine farms & ranches. This is really worrying. Massive sell off's of both horses and cattle flood the market at a time when buyers are not to be found. One disaster after another turning life upside down for millions of people. And now Hurricane Irene is heading towards the east coast with the potential to cause unprecedented damage.
Is there no end to this? No hope in sight?


I can't imagine what millions of residents are going through not knowing what their future is going to be. Well, yes I do. I am still suffering the dire consequences from Hurricane Huckins. I have heard that anyone found abandoning animals in the path of Hurricane Irene will face felony charges, but I don't have any verification. One would think that volunteers from the rescue organizations would already be transporting animals out of harms way.

I had to go and buy house plants & potting soil for my boss, but I was so ill I could barely manage to push the cart. A lousy migraine kept throbbing behind my eyes and the accompanying gagging made it impossible for me to even look at anyone or speak very much. I detest being this ill due to stress. It's so counter-productive.

Some months ago I approached Dianne Stallings, Becky Washburn DVM and Harvey's Feed to see if we in the horse industry could establish a not-for-profit "hay bank" to provide hay for owners struggling in the economy. It's awful being left homeless because you can't function on a professional level.
You can see what is going to happen, you know what is going to happen.. yet you can't even help yourself let alone function the way you need to function.
Please God, I need my life back!


Abandoned Horse Rescue Effort Underway
Dianne Stallings dstallings@ruidosonews.com

The situation isn't new, just a little more common in today's faltering economy. Some owners of pleasure horses who no longer can afford to feed them or of racehorses past their prime or not producing income turn out their equines on public land.

Sometimes the owners operate under the romantic notion the horse will reunite with a wild herd and roam free and happy. More likely, the equine savvy say, the animals will starve from limited forage or water and fall prey to coyotes or mountain lions.

Even worse, some owners opt not to spend the money to humanely euthanize their animals and shoot them in deserted arroyos, as the fate of 11 horses was reported last year. A longtime resident of the valley recalled years ago seeing hooves sticking up like dead trees from manure and trash piles.

One day a few weeks ago, Jessie Hanson, owner of Broken Heart Stable, found a horse on adjoining Forest Service land literally on its last legs surrounded by coyotes waiting for it to drop.

"It looks to be a 30-year-old horse and tattooed (with an identification difficult to discern), just skin and bones," she said. "Animal abuse is a fourth-degree felony and because it was on Forest Service land, it's a federal crime, too.

"It's the end of the racing season and I received a report that (two weeks ago), someone dumped some horses up near Ski Apache that they no longer want to care for. Apparently, then they don't have to worry about state or federal jurisdiction, which would occur on state trust land or Forest Service land. They think they're doing a good thing turning the horses out with other horses, but if they starve, no one can go in and get them."

Alternatives

To head off more dumping of horses, Hanson received permission to post flyers around the track offering owners another option for unwanted horses that, after an evaluation, she thinks could be rehabilitated and trained for a second life. A bill of sale must be rendered with the horse. Meanwhile, she applied for a license as an equine retirement center, which under the state still is classified as a rescue. This won't be her first effort at a horse rescue. Before moving to Lincoln County, Hanson was affiliated in Washington state with People Helping Horses, a rescue and rehabilitation organization.

"This goes on all over the United States," Hanson said. "Horse traders in California have a semi-tractor trailer load once a week (of unwanted horses) or owners turn them loose in the road. I was in Curry County last weekend and was told by several people horses were being turned loose on the roadways there, too."

Lincoln County's history is tightly bound to agriculture and livestock, and part of that industry is to be a responsible horse owner, she said.

"Even though the problem is nationwide, I feel that the residents of Lincoln County should bear some responsibility," Hanson said. "After all, we are entertained by the racetrack, we tend our ranches with horses, tourists pay to trail ride in our beautiful mountains, and many of us live here so we can enjoy our horses 24/7."

The cost

Robert "Bobby" D. Pierce, deputy director of the New Mexico Livestock Board in Albuquerque, said Wednesday that the problem is getting worse because of the prolonged drought that drove up the cost of feed.

"That's always been an issue with these animals who need care," he said. "It's a large expense to euthanize them, so turning them out where the owners think they will be safe is a problem and a growing one. We don't have any numbers on it, but I do believe they are doing it more on reservation and forest land."

Pierce said he's heard from other rescue groups that their donations are down.

"It's a costly venture," he said of Hanson's effort. " Her heart is in the right place but she's taking on a huge job."

As for the prospects of domesticated horses surviving in the wild after becoming accustomed to regular supplies of feed and water, Pierce said some wouldn't be able to adjust. Many already are sick or lame when released and the solution is not just to turn them out.

President Mark Chino of the Mescalero Apache Tribe could not be reached for comment about the impact on tribal land, however, George Douds with the Smokey Bear Ranger District of the Lincoln National Forest said the Service isn't seeing a big problem with horses released on federal land.

"It's something we are aware of and could increase as the economy turns down," he said. "But in the three years I've been here, we haven't noticed a big increase."

Water would be a problem for any abandoned horses because the dirt tanks set up for wildlife won't hold water long and they would be competing with more savvy native wildlife for the resource, Douds said.

Sales

But most owners will take their animals to sale, where they can yield a price per pound, he said. That option opens a whole new and separate debate about the process of slaughtering horses that often are in good condition.

Of those who release their animals, Douds said, "It might be a pleasure horse and they no longer want to feed it, so they let it loose and hope to get it back at some point. If it becomes a problem, the livestock board has jurisdiction over estrays and once they gathered the horse, it should be tattooed and there should be some information on the current or previous owner."

If the horse was found on Forest Service land, the owner would be notified, but no action most likely would be taken, Douds said. "We'd ask him to keep the horse off our land, unless it becomes a habitual problem."

The next offense would result in a letter being sent to the owner and if he still was unresponsive, the owner would be ticketed for livestock trespass and end up in front of a federal judge, Douds said. He added that some livestock is authorized to graze on forestland.

Isolated incidents

Don Hatfield, a Livestock Board public information officer and livestock inspector for the county, said only a few horse owners are offenders and he doesn't want to condemn an industry like racing for those few. He also noted that just because a horse goes to the sale barn doesn't mean it is headed to slaughter.

"Of the ones I've done, none went to slaughter," he said. "They were bought for horses for someone's grandchildren."

He emphasized that inspectors are not the equivalent of dogcatchers. "We're state law enforcement," he said, "who check on brands and ownership and the health of animals and their living conditions."

Sam Wilson, Livestock Board area supervisor and public information officer, said the situation is nothing new for Lincoln County or New Mexico, it's nationwide.

"They put a ban on funding for horse slaughter and there is no place to go with an old horse anymore," he said. "In the past, they were euthanized and sent to Europe, where horse meat is a source of protein and still is eaten.

"When we come across an estray, we follow state statutes on how we deal with it. If we can't identify the owner, it is processed like a cow. We can't give the horse away. It goes to sale, not necessarily auction. It can be sold as long as there are bidders. If the owner lost the horse accidentally, they can at least recoup the proceeds from the sale."

Community

Hanson said she's trying to provide an alternative and is looking for more people to join the effort.

"I received a call from a trainer with a horse that has chips in his knee so he must retire from racing, but after rest and rehabilitation and possible surgery to remove the chips, he could be retained as serviceable as a hunter jumper or a children's horse," she said. "I'm trying to find people to foster until the horse can be evaluated. I can only take one or two.

"I'm trying to be proactive. This is not a straight rescue, it's a retraining, an offer for rehabilitation and a second career. Some of the horses may be horribly injured, but were given nerve blocks. Now they are crippled and may be better off euthanized."

The poster child for the challenge is "Encontrado," Spanish for "found," the horse saved from hungry coyotes and brought to safe retirement by Hanson. About 30 years old, he was turned loose on the Forest Service land to fend for himself, with no water source or forage, Hanson said.

After reporting the find to the Livestock Board, Hatfield came out to look at the animal and Hanson said he told her because the horse was in such an emaciated condition, a Body Score Condition of a 2 on a scale of 1 to 10, that if the owner was found he or she would be facing a fourth-degree felony, and because the horse was "dumped" on federal land, they would also be facing federal charges.

"Needless to say, no on stepped forward," she said.

Any horse owner looking for help in finding a safe retirement for a horse, can contact Hanson. "They will be nurtured, re-trained for a second career such as dressage, hunter/jumper or trail riding, or retired," she said.

For more information, contact Broken Heart Stable at 575-354-0006.



Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy. I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins returns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home. Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen any money I wouldn't be making this plea today. But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy.
Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

I have NOTHING but the continual cruelty and torment of being homeless.


Injustice never rules forever. ~Seneca

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

The Long Way Home

The morning started out simply glorious. 78 degree's, sunny and just plain nice. But I still can't get rid of the physical pain. The stress of trying to get as much done as fast as possible is hard on me, the cool damp weather in the night is affecting me. And the migraine is still there.. not bad enough to put me in bed, but enough to make it difficult to function. The chest pains are getting more severe and more frequent, and for the past few days trying to swallow food has been so painful I don't even want to eat.
I have never experienced this level of stress for this length of time, and I have faced cancer, death, serious illness, loses. Just about every tragedy life can throw at you... but this is so consistent you feel like you can't get your next breath. You are hanging onto thin air.. no grounding, no security.. just a mortifying fear that you are going to die homeless.
As God is my witness I understand the sheer agony Dorothy McKeever went through the last few years of her life.

Before noon the thunder started and a light wind came, but it quickly fizzled out bringing no rain, yet by 7 pm the thunder started up again and the storm clouds appeared over the Sierra Blanca.

Jan phoned and we talked for a while about the economy, and I explained to her that my stomach is in knots perpetually. I had spoken to my oldest daughter this morning and told her the same thing. I wake up and immediately my stomach starts tying in knots with nerves and stress. Those who have homes are feeling nervous these days and I am sat here so vulnerable, homeless, I opening my eyes each day and go directly into sheer panic.
My boss saw a couple of horses for sale in the newspaper so I had to go hunt them down. He was hoping they were from the Super Select sale.. but they were not. Seeing as he hasn't said anything about the palomino roping horse I have not brought it up. He's only seen "no name" once and would probably not recognize him today. He sure has gained a lot of weight, but the cool weather had started the summer coat shedding .. winter is coming fast.

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

When people come to you for help, do not turn them off with pious words, saying, "Have faith and take your troubles to God." Act instead as though there were no God, as though there were only one person in the world who could help -- only yourself.~ Martin Buber

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Here's To Hoping And Coping?


If I felt any better I would be dead. I have no idea why I can't get rid of this migraine but physically my muscles are so taunt that they are irritating the bone tumors and I have felt ghastly all day. I have been so physically drained trying to put one foot in front of the other, or keep my eyes open, has been virtually impossible.

It's getting so cold and damp at night my body may be having a hard time adjusting to the changes in temperature. Whatever happened to me today I have managed to do not one productive thing. And I did that very slowly.

I kept praying that the electrician would phone and that would stop me stressing about the power and utilities to the land. But he didn't and is probably still out of the area. Maybe by this week-end?

This has been a crazy day around the world. Two earthquakes here in the US, one 5.9 in Virginia, the other a 5.2 on the New Mexico-Colorado border. And then there is Libya, and a missing Gaddafi.
The East Coast earthquake gave everyone a lighthearted moment after reporter Charles Babington published this hilarious piece.

Quake provides field day for Washington wise-acres

By CHARLES BABINGTON


WASHINGTON (AP) -- Minutes after Tuesday's earthquake rattled Washington, smart-alecks began flooding the social network site Twitter with wisecracks.

"S&P has downgraded earthquake to a 2.0," said one wag, taking a swipe at the rating agency that recently lowered the federal government's credit-worthiness.

Several 140-character wits took potshots at GOP presidential contenders. "Rick Perry denies earthquake," said one. Another had Michele Bachmann vowing to bring all U.S. earthquakes down to a 2.9 magnitude, a dig at her promise to lower gasoline prices. Still
another said New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, a large man, had just "jumped into" the presidential race.

One photo purporting to illustrate the "devastation" in Washington showed a slightly tilting trash can, while another showed a small plastic chair tipped over on a tranquil lawn.

President Barack Obama wasn't spared: "There was just a 5.9 e
arthquake in Washington. Obama wanted it to be 3.4, but the Republicans wanted 5.9, so he compromised."
There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home. When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares. ~ Henri Nouwen

Monday, August 22, 2011

Missing Front Porch

After a really horrid night I finally got rid of a serious migraine before 10 pm this morning. It poured down last night and the more it rained the more mud and water flowed into the shed. In the dark I was unable to do anything to lessen the damage to my property and belongings, yet the smell of mold and damp made it very difficult to fall to sleep.

I went to the Lazy J early fearing that the migraine would return. The nausea refused to leave and I was having a difficult time just trying to stop myself from being sick. Still, I stayed long enough for Jan and I to discuss the state of the economy, the horse industry and my attempts to get into a home.

The single wide is almost wiped out having been left with not enough repairs to prevent further damage in the past year. But it cost me well over $2,000 to get it in, and have no idea how much it will cost to get it out. I asked Jan to speak with the electrician and ask him if I could hire him to install the electricity - and after that I can try to come up with the funds to start on the barn, but what to do about a home is simply beyond me.
Jan kept saying that if I didn't have the stress of being homeless I wouldn't be this ill, and she is right. Trying to build without money, without credit, and no means to finance is more than I can handle. But that doesn't change anything. If I can get the electricity installed and the well working in the next 4 weeks maybe I will feel a bit more optimistic, but right now I am fighting the worst depression.

My boss was told that there is a Palomino roping horse for sale locally. I checked the phone directory but couldn't find anyone listed under the name he had associated with the horse. Then I phoned the feed stores to see if he was a regular client whom they knew. I then did a web search, and came up with nothing. So, I drove to the area the owner resides looking for the horse. An hour later I had seen neither hide nor hair of a horse, or even a horse trailer. The rain just poured.

The invisible palomino roping horse was as elusive as my invisible home.

I returned to the shed and was met with fresh mud and more flies than any human being could imagine. If Alfred Hitchcock was alive today it wouldn't be inconceivable to re-write the script of "The Birds" and resurrect it as "The Flies."

By that time I was so seriously ill I could barely walk. I so desperately want "normal".. a home, a front porch, my career, my family... and winter is so close you can almost feel it. Even as I drove back up to Ruidoso from Nogal a heavy mist almost covered the mountain.Sometimes I wonder if I will ever find anyone who cares. Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, Michael Huckins, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) Anyone who may know where our building fund is hidden, or anyone who may help retrieve it. I am praying that one of you can speak to your cousin, brother, son and appeal to him to return the building fund he stole from us.
While it was 24 degrees below zero outside you were all in warm homes. I was outside with no heat.
While your lives have gone on uninterrupted.

While your lives have gone on as normal, my family, my career, our lives have been irreparably shattered.
I have not been able to see my mother since she came to Ruidoso to buy a home in 2007.
Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

We have tried every means to go on without the stolen money. But we can't obtain a home and restore our family unless it is returned. I implore, I beg as I have never begged before, I am begging for mercy. Please get Robert Huckins to return what wasn't his to steal. What was our legal property. What we desperately needed to put a roof over our heads. To have a home. No-one should be so cruel and callous to steal someone's home and leave women homeless and desperate.

Everything in the universe goes by indirection. There are no straight lines. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sunday, August 21, 2011

The Meaning Of A Home

Today has been one of those lazy but simply beautiful days. Even the distant thunder and the arrival of a few rain storms didn't prevent the sun from shining. If I had a home I would have wanted to stay home today. I would have been busy in the garden, in the barn... it would have been one of those days where a 24 hour day just isn't enough.. a 48 hour day sounds so much better.

But I don't have a home.

So I pottered around and groomed "No-name" and did not accomplish a great deal.. but think about having a home.


Because I didn't have any retirement plan, social security, or savings it was clearly obvious that I would have to "hit the ground running" as soon as our home and barn was built in 2008. By 2008 it had become just as obvious that the economy was rolling. The horse industry starts to see and feel it well in advance of the general population.
And here I am almost 4 years later.. homeless. In the midst of a recession-depression.

Four years when you are closer to 60 year old, than 30 years old is a lifetime. It's a nightmare without end.
Today I cried a lot. Tears that I didn't seem to be able to control. And I was sad a lot, because I knew that today was the type of day I would have simply loved. If I had a home.

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that Robert Huckins was not going to steal our money and leave me homeless. You personally guaranteed that it would be returned before harm came to us.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

Nothing is so hard for those who abound in riches as to conceive how others can be in want. ~ Jonathan Swift

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Stolen: If Found Please Return To Owner

I didn't feel very well today, a migraine pounded behind my eyes and I felt sick but I was awake very early. The stress and worry is turning into a serious depression and I'm unsure how to cope with depression. I am simply terrified of facing another winter without a home, and it's emotionally wearing me down.

What a gorgeous morning met me. I started pulling No Names mane & trimmed him up, right after sun up and gave him a good strapping down.
He certainly is enjoying the attention and I'm tickled pink with his progress.

By 11.30 am the thunder started and the sky became overcast, the wind started up and the rain came. During the monsoon season you have to get as much done as early as possible, for one never knows what the weather will be like from one hour to the next. There was no heavy rains today. A light rain, a lot of thunder and lightening and.. I overheard.. a wildfire caused by a lightening strike close to us.

The flies are just awful. I don't think I have ever had to fight so many flies. They are so numerous it's impossible to drink a drink, and the smell of the fly spray is toxic.

Three men have left an indelible mark in this world. Three men I hold in the highest esteem. Albert Einstein, Albert Schweitzer and Nelson Mandela. None had an easy life. All knew adversity, hardship, cruelty. Man's in humanity towards man. Yet all emerged as fierce fighters for human and civil rights, showing us that life can make one better, not bitter.
That kindness and compassion crosses borders, cultures, ethnicity, religion and often politics.

I don't know what makes one man turn into an icon for humanity, and another turn into a rogue who destroys and plunders. One the pinnacle of what is good, the other the epitome of evil. I will never understand human nature but I thank God for men like Albert Einstein, Albert Schweitzer and Nelson Mandela.

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination. ~Nelson Mandela