Monday, March 14, 2011

Missing My Family

What a stressful day this has been.

My grand-daughter came to Ruidoso to visit, and having not seen her in 3 years it was heartbreaking that I couldn't take her "home" with me. We sat in the Wal-Mart car park for what seemed like an eternity. A grandmother and her 10 year old grand-daughter trying to play catch up, trying to spend time together, but having no place to go that can welcome family.

I waited for Ashley to ask to spend the night, go home with me, as she normally would. To say anything that would force me to admit that I am homeless. How do you explain to an 11 year old that a builder has hidden your building fund - the only finances you had for a home - and there isn't a home anymore.
But she had clearly been forewarned, and kept a distance from the subject.

I miss my family and the loss is simply ripping my heart out. All the way up Gavilan Canyon back to the shed I sobbed heartbroken.

Salt was added to the wounds when I passed Robert Huckins as he left his comfortable home heading to his mothers home in Upper Canyon.. sometimes I wonder how law enforcement and the judicial system can look itself in the face without blushing.
Perhaps they don't even see their own reflection.

The Ford350, "the gray ghost", has finally gone. Where to find another hauling truck on my meager income - already under water trying to get into the single wide and get the barn finished - is yet another problem that I simply can't handle.

I missed my home and felt the barb of homelessness especially sharp today, and I still have no idea how to find the help needed to renovate the trailer and help get the roof on the barn.

I am not interested in picking up crumbs of compassion thrown from the table of someone who considers himself my master. I want the full menu of rights. ~ Bishop Desmond Tutu.