Sunday, July 31, 2011

Behind The Eight Ball

Yesterday morning I woke up at 5 am with a wicked migraine. After numbing myself with medication it stayed as a dull throb behind my right eye, but I had already started to feel nauseous. The weather was so beautiful and so cool I wished I felt better physically. But I didn't and I found myself too ill to try to do anything until almost 3 pm. By that time dark angry clouds were coming over the Sierra Blanca, but they brought no rain.

My trip to TR's to get a racing program for my boss had me sitting outside the store so physically ill I didn't know how to get into that store or out again without vomiting. There are times gagging is so bad my throat feels like razor blades have been playing skip rope right behind my tongue and down my throat.

My step father died of emphysema. A designing engineer for British Jeffrey Diamonds for 35 years he had to be one of the most honest, honorable and intelligent human beings I have ever met. A lot of the machinery used in American mines.. he designed. Up until his death his mind was as sharp as anytime in his life. He was trapped in a dying body.
I couldn't imagine the sheer horror of having full faculties, of wanting to do things but not having the physical ability to do so.
Today I am starting to understand more than I want to.
As a woman being left homeless by a convicted felon is perhaps the most terrifying thing I have ever experienced for many reasons. It's not the silent crashing of your life around you. A career in shambles. It's not the fractured family, loved ones you can't see. It's not health problems or financial problems. It's not the loss of self esteem and self worth as you beg for someone, anyone, to stop this madness. It's not the gossip and lying borne from bored people who want to embroider stories that are not true. It's not any one of those particular things.. it's the whole package. It's everything compounded. It's being told that I am right behind the eight ball, with thieves holding the money they stole from us, and not one person cares.

This morning I woke up still with the dull pain behind my eyes but no longer feeling nauseous. Prayerfully rain will come today.. we need it in the worst way. Lord, let it rain.

Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy.

I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins retu
rns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless.

Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen our building fund I wouldn't be making this plea today.

But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.
Criminal: A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation. ~ Howard Scott.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Wipe Your Feet

The weather was simply gorgeous today, a nice and cool 77 degree's in the morning with a nice breeze blowing. At it's highest it never went over 82 degrees, but the constant damp during the night is wearing me down and making it virtually impossible for me to physically move.

The clouds seem to be taunting us. The dark clouds come overhead persuading you that rain is going to fall, and minutes later the sun appears. A scenario repeated throughout the day without a drop of rain falling. Everything is so dry it's starting to look like autumn already.

I have gained 50 lbs in the last 2 years and I need to lose that weight. One of the difficulties of being this ill is the frequency you stay in bed unable to move.. and the weight gain was an unexpected consequence for someone who was in a size 3 jean size and weighed 102 lbs at the time our building fund was stolen.

When my youngest daughter was in Ruidoso last week she said that I looked like, "grandma." Looking at the photographs of myself, how ill and tired I look, I must disagree. My 85 year old mother looks a whole lot better than I do today. The photographs on the blog were taken during the time I hired Robert Huckins by the way. One day I may have the courage to show what has happened to me since.. but not today. Today I am too much of a coward to post recent photographs.
The Huckins literally wiped me into the ground.
I went to TR's to pick up a racing program for my boss and couldn't get out fast enough. Jan invited me to an organization function ~ as her guest, and I agreed to attend until I started to fear how I could handle being with people for hours. I can't go hours without being physically ill. The gagging, and often vomiting, is so out of control I am trying to teach myself to breathe through my nose to lessen the severity. This kind of nervous reaction, compounded by the severe migraines, through prolonged stress is fairly new to me. I have never even heard of it until it happened to me during the constant court trial delays. I have had a nervous disposition in my entire life.
Today I have no idea how to stop it.

I'm as tough as nails. I have the "metal" the early pioneers have. But not tough enough to withstand the past few years. It's amazing what years of stress, court cases, homelessness can do to a person. It is the most destruction one can do to a human being without being arrested for murder, or torment, and I suspect that murder would be a lot more humane. And that isn't a sarcastic comment. I truly mean it.

I still have not heard a word about the electricity to my land. The day I actually get that information I expect it to be brought by someone walking on water...

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There
was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

Walking, working, barely breathing. My thoughts, far away, Heart aching, mind racing. Sleep does not come easily, nor last long....~Peter Winstanley

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Reckless Endangerment

Yesterday all afternoon and evening the thunder and lightening clattered directly above us, but the serious rain fall seemed to head towards Ruidoso and Ruisoso Downs, again. The damp weather and slow drizzle is very welcome, but it's playing havoc with my body. It was 51 degree's this morning when I woke up, which felt a whole lot less because of the 50% dew point. I was simply freezing cold and my body was stiff and sore. Still, we need this moisture in the worst way. Yesterday I could barely put one foot in front of the other, and I ended up going to bed last night very early with a terrible migraine.

All morning the mule deer followed me around as I tried to weed the garden. The drought has been very hard on them, without adequate food to forage. I am so used to both deer and elk coming in to beg food during the winter, but this is the first time I have seen so many during the summer.

In the late morning I went to Ruidoso to do some shopping for my boss, stopping at the soccer field to watch my youngest grand-daughter participate in the church sponsored sports camp. On the way back to Alto it suddenly hit me that almost everyone was going "home" but I don't have a home to go to.
I'm simply shattered.

I have still not heard a word about the electricity on the land. Even though I try not to panic the anxiety is so bad that I am having a difficult time sleeping for the night terrors. This is the fourth winter I am facing homeless and it's become very clear that when a career criminal has been allowed to keep doing the same pattern of behavior, subjecting so many people, mostly women, to the same hardships, it's nothing more than reckless endangerment. Especially when the convicted felon admitted, under testimony, that this was a premeditated act. The fact that it would leave women homeless doesn't seem to be of any consequence. "Abuse" simply doesn't meet the extreme nature of the crime.

Someone should throw Robert & Sylve Huckins out of their home for a winter and let them be subjected to the elements homeless and in dire straits. Throwing the judges out with them may not be a bad idea.There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. ~Hans Christian Anderson

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

****The Price Of Crime****

The rain today was simply wonderful but Ruidoso seemed to get so much more than the slight sprinkling Alto received. Still, the lower temperature felt great and we have 3 or 4 days of rain forecast.

I was raised to believe that crime doesn't pay, and I know that God assures us that it will not pay in the end - but with the months fleeting by my focus is on the winter and how I'm going to be able to see my mother, and get into a home again. It's been such a long time since I last had a home or could see my mother.
Because Robert Huckins stole our building fund in 2008 I have invested almost $140,000, and ended up homeless.


IF he returned the $82,000 he stole from us I could buy a nice used double wide and get the barn finished. Have enough funds to get the utilities turned on. Get our lives restored. But he won't return the money because not one person wants to make him return the money.
While Robert & Sylve Huckins sat inside their comfortable home last winter I was sat in MINUS 25 degree's weather with NO heat. And this has continued on for over 3 years.

In other words, he doesn't have to pay a price for his criminal behavior. The victims do.



Desperate for any type of a home, and with a small amount of donated money, in 2010 I purchased an old single wide and tried to get it renovated. CID (New Mexico Construction Industries) came along and red tagged me. http://roberthuckinsvictim.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-mexico-cid-twilight-zone.html By the time the dust had settled and permits issued all volunteers had disappeared.

Having been given 27 years in jail for felony fraud and embezzlement in three (3) cases, including mine, the time in jail was suspended on the proviso that Robert Huckins return my money "with expedience." A court order was issued that after the hearing I learned was .. quite truthfully.. not worth the paper it's written on. In other words, restitution in the state of New Mexico is unenforceable. My chances of getting anything but a little bit at a time for a very short period of time is almost zero. If we could talk in minus zero terms that would be more befitting. http://roberthuckinsvictim.blogspot.com/2011/06/robert-huckins-legal-plea.html

In the 1980's Robert & Sylve Huckins purchased a house for $160,000 or thereabouts. A judge in Roswell, New Mexico, removed all the liens previous victims put on his home. Making him debt free. Dorothy McKeever had received $200 in restitution and was told to give the money back to Robert Huckins.
She had a heart attack and died before she could cash the checks.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.
Dorothy's daughter's wrote:



My mother was a victim of Bob Huckins she worked her whole life to retire in Ruidoso when he cheated her of her dream. He took advantage of her kind heart her trust and she is left with an unfinished home - he walked away with well over 100K. We thought the safety measures were in place the bank 'WAS' to send an inspector for each draw he requested. He would bring an invoice to my mother who is sight impaired and tell her what he had done she would sign and submit to the bank. The bank would send an inspector and release the money to him. Reviewing the paperwork of work he claimed to have completed was fabricated and not even started but there on the bottom of the page was a signature from an inspector - a co-conspirator I can only suspect. She had to return to work in her 70's to pay for other contractors to make the house livable. My stomach turns when I go there and see the hardships she has had to endure and the conditions she has had to live in.
I hope you get your due Mr. Hutchins - you are a crook. My faith is only in the judicial system that they will successfully convict you and you spend you time behind bars.

****
I am also disgusted with Mr. Huckins...He left my mother with a half built house as stated by Judy Torres my sister. I blame him and the bank for distributing the monies to him when a full inspection was not completed properly. When I asked the bank for the names of the inspectors I was told they could not disclose that information. I did have a signature but of course could not identify any of the letters. And it seems rather odd when all the monies were distributed to Bob the loan officer at the bank was transferred. My mother sits there with a half built house while he is still running around the town and not behind bars.

Dana Dildene was another victim:

I'm trying to take care of my elderly mom who needs 24/7 care + work, etc. We have lost more money than we can afford at this point to help them survive the rest of their life. Every month is tough to meet the bills and we have no state assistance. He left us high and dry and cost us years worth of rent to help take care of my mom's increasing medical costs. I received a letter for creditors to attend the bankruptcy court in Roswell. I attended and was told that due to the bankruptcy they were removing the lien I put on his house. It's totally unfair.

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that our money would be returned before harm came to us.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it.
There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever, $45,000 from Francis McKinney. The list just goes on and on and on.
Because of Robert Huckins I ended up paying
$140,000 to be homeless.. sat in the cold, emotionally, physically and financially broke. In the middle of a recession, with no way to recover the stolen funds.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. ~Philip K. Dick

Monday, July 25, 2011

Held Hostage

My youngest daughter left Ruidoso right after noon yesterday, and I was pretty upset to see her go. Her health is so bad that I wanted to protect her, and watching her leave was the hardest thing to do. We all sat at Sonic eating before they got back on the road heading towards Missouri. As we sat there chatting the rains came, not a heavy rain, but another light shower that was so needed and much appreciated. My nerves are so bad I started gagging, and fearing that I couldn't stop I beat a hasty retreat back to the vehicle.

Since then I have been wide awake, tossing, turning.. can't sleep for worrying about what to do about my mother, the property, a home, my daughter, career in a deepening recession and survival is hinged on getting back the stolen money.
I am so sincerely ill, and so exhausted.

I don't think there is anything I have not tried. I have tried to re-finance, tried to sell the land, trade the land, tried to find an affordable trailer, tried to get the electricity sorted out. I tried to find any building we could live in, tried to renovate this single wide and I have tried begging.
Frustrated doesn't even start to describe my emotions. And here we are going back into August.

How anyone could keep doing this to women and not have one iota of conscience befuddles me.

For the past 30 hours I have been so mired down by worry, panic, anxiety and a feeling of absolute sheer terror I don't think I could think straight if my life depended upon it.

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers footsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.
Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.

It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home. ~Carl T. Rowan

Saturday, July 23, 2011

What Welshmen do when they're bored



This video was simply too good to not post.

YouTube Video To Be Made

The day started off about as bad as it could. The damp weather has the same effect on me as rust has to a bolt. When I woke up at sunrise I couldn't move. Someone had replaced my spine and hips with rusted metal. From my neck to my ankles every joint was frozen in place and trying to move became an exercise in frustration. A migraine pounded my head, and my eyes hurt really bad.
I absolutely love this rain, but the side effects of sleeping in it I can well do without.

The very last thing I remember last night was feeling so cold. Sneezing and coughing wondering if the pneumonia that I had for months last year had returned with a vengeance. This morning there was no coughing, no sneezing.. just one stiff old lady hobbling around.

I had to go early to Ruidoso. My youngest daughter was released from isolation last week, but it was a bit shock when she sent me a text to tell me that she was here in town. It's been 4 -5 years since we last saw one another, and I have been so worried about her, so it was pretty exciting to know that she had accompanied Julie who had brought her kids back to their father.

I didn't know that a severe case of MRSA could be THIS devastating, this damaging to the human body. We met at TR's store and when she drove up I didn't even recognize my own daughter. My heart sank into the pit of my stomach. I just wanted to hug her and not let go. Then I wanted to take her home, but I don't have a home to take her to. To watch your 35 year old daughter go through this level of illness is more than a mother's heart can withstand.

We all went to Nogal and lots of photographs were taken. Then we all went to my property. I have never been on the property since last year when the few volunteers I had disappeared with CID on my heels, so I had no idea what to expect. Going there simply reduces me to tears, it's more emotional than I can handle by myself.

As I expected, the high winds had ruined the tin I purchased for the roof. It was scattered everywhere and these are such long and heavy sheets I can't move them by myself. The single wide may have sustained far more damage since CID red tagged me almost a year ago. What started out as a fairly simplistic but extensive restoration project may now be impossible. But it cost me thousands of dollars and how to get it off the land is beyond me. The tarp I put over the trailer is torn to shreds. It was so disheartening...

This was our "dream" home!

My youngest daughter and her friend stood with their mouths open before getting upset, then angry. It's a lot different being told what is happening than actually seeing what is happening, and the reality is traumatic.

A few weeks ago a reader of this blog suggested that I do a Youtube video. At that time I didn't, couldn't, see the advantage of producing a video vs writing a blog. But everyone since then has agreed that it's one thing being "told" the consequences middle age or senior female victims of crime suffer, than actually "seeing" it with ones own eyes. After taking dozens of photographs of my land and barn we returned to Ruidoso and started discussing the Youtube video and my youngest daughters health care. Tomorrow she will return to Missouri and I'm going to be sad to see her go, because I worry so about her. Just spending the day with her made it a very good day today.

Jan never did talk to the electrician so this is like looking for chickens teeth, week after week trying to find out what I have to do to get electricity onto this land. I am simply terrified of not being able to get this property liveable before winter and having to face bitter cold weather in freezing temperatures, and as July starts to move towards August panic is setting in.

I will start working on the YouTube video and my first stop will be this blog, the Huffington Post: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/news/homelessness and, here is that frequently used word: Invisible People http://invisiblepeople.tv/blog/

Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and persuade Robert Huckins to return ALL of the money he stole from us.

I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy. No woman should be left homeless because of a criminal who refuses to return the money he stole. I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins returns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless and survive. These are absolutes, realities I cannot change. I have tried.

Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen any money I wouldn't be making this plea today.

But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, I can't be outside through another winter, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die.
Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.Sometimes we think that to develop an open heart, to be truly loving and compassionate, means that we need to be passive, to allow others to abuse us, to smile and let anyone do what they want with us. Yet this is not what is meant by compassion. Quite the contrary. Compassion is not at all weak. It is the strength that arises out of seeing the true nature of suffering in the world. Compassion allows us to bear witness to that suffering, whether it is in ourselves or others, without fear; it allows us to name injustice without hesitation, and to act strongly, with all the skill at our disposal. To develop this mind state of compassion ... is to learn to live, as the Buddha put it, with sympathy for all living beings, without exception.~ Sharon Salzberg

Friday, July 22, 2011

Where Are They Now?


Today brought answered prayer... more rain!

Before noon the thunder started to edge closer and the dark rain clouds came over the Sierra Blanca. And by 12.30 pm the rain started. Not the normal deluge we can get in the monsoon season, but a slow drizzle that sent the temperature plummeting from 85 degrees to 63 degrees in less than an hour. We saw not a sign of the sun all afternoon.
By the time I came inside this dark shed I was so cold, damp and "freezing met me at the door."

The Bassel-Hagens disease, ( dozens upon dozens of bone tumors in my spine, hips, shoulders, ankles and all other bones/joints ) and the associated arthritis makes it pretty difficult to retain mobility when I sleep in the damp and can't get warm and dry, so I was already having problems walking. But it's so delightful to see moisture I can't find it within my heart to complain. What a shame that we can't have warm rain and summer temperatures.
I don't like growing old even at the best of time, in the best of circumstances. But these circumstances are so unreal you have to pinch yourself to believe that it's happening. Then again, it could be 120 degree's like most of the country and I really would be complaining in earnest.

Jan phoned and told me that she is going to speak to the electrician tomorrow, so that will give me a more solid knowledge about what I need to do to get electricity to the land. But I can't deny that I am now worried about the water well. This is so thoroughly exhausting for a woman alone.

I never intended this blog to have a socio-political twist to it, but we are all victims of our own nature. The bombings in Norway was a terrible tragedy today, my mind went to those we have all seen suffer tragedy in the past few months.

We have watched so many lives destroyed in floods, tornadoes, wildfires in 2011 and I wonder why we can't get media updates about how those poor people are managing. Where are they now?

Again... an appeal to those reading. I just can't explain how serious this situation is and if people are willing to risk their lives to get food to the starving, please give in abundance..

Dear Friend,

The situation is getting worse for millions in the Horn of Africa. Famine has been declared in two regions of southern Somalia, and is likely to spread to neighboring areas if nothing is done to alleviate the suffering.This is the first time in 20 years that a food crisis has reached the technical definition of a famine. Some experts fear the current conditions will cause more devastation than the drought that spread from the Horn of Africa in the 1980s. Already, more than 11 million people are in urgent need of life-saving assistance. Please help today.
  • In Somalia, 3.7 million people — half the population — are in need of humanitarian assistance.
  • In Kenya's Dadaab refugee camp, an average of 1,300 Somali refugees arrive each day. Half of the newly arrived children are malnourished, and many die on the way to the camp.
  • Ethiopia has the largest number of people affected — 4.5 million lives are at risk from the crisis.
  • Drought conditions are spreading into Tanzania — where 500,000 people are already affected — and threatening other nearby countries.

  • If you've already given to help save children's lives in the Horn of Africa, thank you. World Vision has launched a widespread response to the crisis, including emergency feeding programs for children, food distributions for vulnerable families, access to clean water and healthcare, protection of livestock, peacekeeping efforts, and more.

But more help is desperately needed to save children's lives.

The Horn of Africa is unlikely to receive normal rainfall until early next year, and food prices continue to rise. Because World Vision has worked in the region for decades, we have been awarded government grants that can multiply the impact of your gift 5 times.

Join with us in praying for children and families in the Horn of Africa, and for improved conditions throughout the region. And please send a gift that multiplies 5 times in impact to help today.

Thank you for your generosity.

In Him,

Rich Stearns
President, World Vision U.S.
World Vision: http://donate.worldvision.org
United Nations Food program: http://www.wfp.org/
No matter how bad things may be, no matter how deep our hurts. We look at the plight of others and it simply breaks your heart.Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins, Malcolm Huckins. Your brother, cousin, son stole our building fund. Until he returns it we are destitute and desperate and I appeal to you to have mercy upon us and motivate him to return our money to us so we can live in a home. I'm unsure how anyone can view leaving women, like Dorothy McKeever and myself in the worst situation any human being can be in, as acceptable. It's not acceptable. Victimizing women should never be acceptable behavior. All I want is the money for our home returned - our building fund - and to be allowed to have our lives and family back. That isn't a lot to ask for, just asking for what is ours. But it's everything to us. I am pleading for your intervention.
We can discover this meaning in life in three different ways: (1) by doing a deed; (2) by experiencing a value; and (3) by suffering. ~Victor Frankl

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Fighting Famine in East Africa from Minn.















I never ask for money. I never ask for anything but that which is our legal and moral property. All we desire is the stolen property returned. Our home.

But today, I am asking for money. If all send $10 per person we very easily could save lives, heart ache, heart break and suffering. It's just the right thing to do.

Fighting Famine In East Africa

Updated: Sunday, 17 Jul 2011, 10:01 PM CDT
Published : Sunday, 17 Jul 2011, 10:01 PM CDT

Famine, starving children, little hope, living in war-ravaged areas of east Africa -- places like Somalia.

Two groups at the forefront of helping these children are based right here in Minnesota with new efforts, new ideas to help save these families

The American Refugee Relief Agency And The American Relief Agency for the Horn of Africa say the situation in east Africa is the worst humanitarian disaster ever. With us now are the leaders of both organizations, Mohamed Idris and Daniel Wordsworth.


Read more: Fighting Famine in East Africa from Minn. http://www.myfoxtwincities.com/dpp/news/Fighting-Famine-in-East-Africa-from-Minn.-Debate-july-17-2011#ixzz1SmnwIf48

World Vision: http://donate.worldvision.org
United Nations Food program: http://www.wfp.org/

Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can.~ John Wesley

What Happened To Ethics?

I woke up so ill at 5 am this morning that I would have preferred the entire day go away. Throughout the night I went from one nightmare to another, stressing so much about my mother, work, a home . Just trying to do the impossible in my sleep, falling into a quagmire of terror in the process. In the midst of the nightmares it came to me that I don't even know if the water well is functional, because it has never been used.

I have been discussing the courts, homelessness, this level of unadulterated cruelty and abuse that we see happen over and over again towards older women. I thought we had a judicial system in place that would prevent situations as I have gone through, and a level of moral fortitude that prevails in our society towards female victims of crime.

In one conversation someone asked why other women had not continued to pursue this. Why everyone was so silent. And I thought about it before responding. Perhaps they realized that no-one cares?
The more we discussed the details of this case the more unbelievable it became.

In 2008 Robert Huckins was arrested days after he withdrew $110,000 from the Wells Fargo bank and hide it. At a bail hearing in Ruidoso Downs a minister from the Ruidoso Episcopal Church accompanied Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins to that hearing.

I wasn't even told of the hearing by the DA's office. I was cleaning horse stalls when Nancy Canning phoned me and told me that I had to get to the court asap. I arrived filthy dirty, and met with Officer John Barnes, white collar crime investigator for the State Police, and the assistant DA outside the court.There was a victims advocate waiting for me. And I will have to admit that even when the victims advocate took me into a room and explained the process I didn't think I needed a victims advocate. In my mind there was right, there was wrong, and no "right" society would allow a criminal to steal women's homes and throw an entire family into despair and permanent homeless.

I thought this hearing was the end of the nightmare and our building fund would be returned. I had THAT much faith not only in the courts, but in society - in the believe that Christians stand for everything led by Christ. And Lincoln County is a Christian society with well over 45 churches, and almost all judges are members of a local church.
But before the court hearing, with my oldest daughter and grand-children playing outside the glass door to the court house, I overheard this Episcopal minister telling Patricia Ogilvi-Huckins about his new home. Clearly he was new to the Ruidoso area. So I politely turned to him and somewhat jokingly asked him if he had spare bedrooms, because my mother and I had our building fund stolen, and we had been left with no resources.

There was an absolute earth shattering silence, and the minister turned red. It wasn't long before he departed, but the fact that he was faced with a woman who was the victim of a heinous felony crime that would destroy a family either didn't register or wasn't a consideration. Yet I thought nothing of it..
Until I saw the outcome of over three years of hell. A restitution not worth the paper it is written on, and no financial ability to get a home.

Robert Huckins was absolutely right when he said that no-one would do anything about his stealing so much money. It may have been the only time that man was even capable of speaking truth. But how did he know what the outcome would be? What gave him this level of confidence to keep committing crimes even when under indictment for prior crimes? Where did immunity derive from?

Our building fund is but one case. What happened about the $30-$40k he stole from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL.
Nothing.

What about the civil judgements: $30-40k taken from Francis McKinney. $89-100k taken from Dorothy McKeever. Dana Dildene, Nancy Canning .. and so many more women.
All wiped clean by a bankruptcy judge, or not even filed at all. For there was only 3 cases filed at felony level, that was myself, Sally Canning and Dr. Brown.

And where did all the hot checks go to? Why were they never filed as criminal charges? Several were in the thousands of dollars, all were in the hundreds of dollars.

In the spring of 2008 Robert Huckins walked into a real estate office. He told the real estate agent that he had power of attorney for an absentee client who owned land locally, and he had the power of attorney to sell the land WITH the plans for a 2000 or 3000 sq foot home on it. The real estate agent never asked to see the power of attorney. A power of attorney that simply didn't exist.
I had no idea what was going on until I opened the Ruidoso News and saw MY land for sale with plans for a large home on it.

I phoned the real estate agent literally trembling. The State Police white collar crime division eventually, after months of begging legislators and government officials for help, came in and investigated the fraudulent power of attorney claim. At which time Huckins admitted that he had our building fund, had never intended to build a home, and would return the money without any further delay.

Common sense dictates that if you have commit so many felony crimes that are destroying people, and you admit to having the stolen money in your possession, you give it back to prevent criminal charges being filed. But Robert Huckins didn't do that because somehow he knew that no-one had power to make him. He had immunity from one source or another.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins, Malcolm Huckins. Your brother, cousin, son stole our building fund. I contact you because I am desperate enough to try and locate anyone who would help me retrieve the building fund your cousin, brother, son stole.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that our money would be returned before harm came to us.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

I don't understand how this family stood by and watched so many women being victimized. I honestly and truly try to understand.. but I don't.
How could anyone sit and watch this happen to women who didn't have other resources? The level of cruelty is incomprehensible.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that Robert Huckins was not going to steal our money and leave me homeless. You personally guaranteed that it would be returned before harm came to us.

I had to investigate myself. I had to stop work and do all of the leg work myself because no-one was going to help me. It cost an absolute small fortune to get any type of justice. But the justice was not going to give myself and my mother a home. Yet the only thing I want is what we bought and paid for.

I am simply begging you to make Robert Huckins return our stolen building fund in one lump sum so we can try to recover our lives,see my mother, and live in a home like you all do. Like Robert and Sylve Huckins does. Nothing more. Nothing less. Physically and emotionally I simply cannot withstand any more of this abuse. I am too ill and the stress of being homeless is killing me. I pray you will have mercy upon us. You are my only hope. I am begging, literally on my knee's begging.

Religion is to do right. It is to love, it is to serve, it is to think, it is to be humble. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Pillar To Post

The morning started out wonderfully, I had put a movie in to watch last night, but quickly fell asleep. I'm sure that I missed a good movie, but my body so needs sleep that it was a blessing to miss it.

By 7 am the deer had started to arrive begging for food. In a drought, with so little foliage to eat it's not unusual for the deer to remain in the lower elevations instead of heading further up the mountain. What amazes me is that the larger herds I am seeing are all young buck.

The skies soon became cloudy and the thunder shattered the silence. I felt sure that THIS was going to be the day that rains came again, but the clouds continued east almost teasing us. We really need more rain in the worst possible way. Throughout the afternoon I ran errands, and stopped by the hospital to say a word with my oldest daughter.

Walking into Lawrence Bros. I bumped into Robert Huckins, who had the normal air of condescending arrogance.. the smirk of "gotcha" and there is nothing you can do about it. I despair at the heartache and heartbreak this man has caused so many elderly women. It is thoroughly shameful. But it's even worse knowing that he was allowed to get way with it.. no matter how much destruction it caused.

For a reason I never really understand I have been seriously depressed today... just a sadness & fear I couldn't overcome and overwhelmed me.

August is so close I am almost dreading to see the calendar turn over for fear that it will be the last straw for me. No matter how many phone calls, how many attempts I make trying to just get the barn started or the single wide finished I am so short of funds I can't do it.
I know, beyond a shadow of doubt, that until someone actually makes Robert and or Sylve Huckins return the building fund he stole from us, I don't have a prayer. And I am terrified of the consequences we will pay.

Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy. I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins returns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless. Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen any money I wouldn't be making this plea today. But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.Goodness makes greatness truly valuable, and greatness make goodness much more serviceable. ~Matthew Henry

Ron Paul: "We Will Default Because The Debt Is Unsustainable"

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Home Improvement

Yesterday I was so chronically ill I could barely make it through the day. Thankfully I fell asleep very early and had a peaceful night, which is what I needed to be able to get over the chest pains and migraine.

I woke up wide eyed and bushy tailed at 5 am feeling so good I wanted to fall prostrate and thank the Lord.

Early this morning I phoned Jan for an update on the electricity, and she was going to phone the electrician because she knew that he had secured the information I needed to proceed. So for right now it's a "hurry up and wait" proposition. I am praying that I have the adequate funds to get this problem rectified once and for all. Emotionally I simply can't handle this continued "spinning wheels," and physically I can't survive another winter homeless.

Even though it's very warm, 87 degree's, the clouds are making it feel far more tolerable. Yet my heart and eyes are set on the upcoming winter simply terrified that the house and barn cannot be started let alone finished by then.
It makes summers nothing beyond a stress filled horror of horrors that I have tried to withstand for 3 years, but I know that my health is failing and I can't go on physically or emotionally much further.

This afternoon I met with my daughter and went shopping for my boss, while she finished the shopping for the emergency services function. We walked around Wal-Mart, bumping into friends and co-workers past and present, and we discussed the economy. The difficulties people are having making ends meet.
We reflected on my own situation. If I lost this shed, which has kept me afloat for over 3 years, I may as well put a gun to my head because homeless without a home and barn I am so vulnerable. I can't afford to rent. I'm far too ill to do what I could have done 3 years ago. Not knowing if I can ever see my mother alive again I'm a nervous wreck.

This has been over three years of being subjected to the worst type of abuse any woman could imagine from a non-family member. Months upon months of bullying, lying, threatening, tormenting. A constant cat and mouse game both with myself, investigators and the district attorney's office. saying that he would return the stolen building fund time and time again, then not returning it. It was frustrating for everyone, but for myself my entire life, my career, my mother ~ everything, was on the line. And Robert Huckins knew that.

If the economy is frightening young married couples with stability how it is supposed to effect a middle aged disabled woman with a mother in her 80's, who has lost all the money they had for a home to a criminal.. who still refuses to give it back. Because to not give it back is the control, the power, to destroy human beings.

http://youtu.be/MHk-vvsDWnM

Ron Paul: "We Will Default Because The Debt Is Unsustainable"

I am so frightened I can't stand it. Frightened of winter coming. Mortified that I may never see my mother alive again. Horrified that I may never ever have a home again and will die homeless.
Again I appeal to the Huckins family members I am aware of, Malcolm Huckins, Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. What happened to Dorothy McKeever was inexcusable, and not one person would speak up for her. What happened to myself and my family no different. Your brother, cousin, son, Robert Huckins, stole our building fund. He walked out of the Wells Fargo Bank on Sudderth Drive with $110,000 DAYS before the White Collar Crime investigators, for the State of New Mexico, demanded that he repay ALL of our building fund back within a 30 day period. The money disappeared into thin air, even though days later he was recorded in a deposition admitting that he had the money, adding that he didn't need 30 days to repay the money back, he could pay it back in less time. Officer John Barnes of the state police was present during that deposition. Someone knows where our building fund is. And the people who know where it is are perfectly aware of the damage they are doing. There was much, much money collected from numerous victims than the amount of money recorded in this particular withdrawal from the Wells Fargo bank. And it wasn't spent on contracted jobs, because almost all employees and subcontractors were given hot checks. A number so large in dollar amount and numbers that it was impossible to account for them all. I can't physically go on being homeless and I want to see my mother. The 12th District Courts described this damage as "grievous." I would call it far more. Abuse above and beyond what any woman should be subjected to, let alone a victim of crime. I implore you to intervene and make your brother, cousin, son, return ALL of the building fund that he stole so that we can have what you all have... a home. We have paid for a home many, many times over both in finances and pain & suffering due to this continued this cruelty. I will keep asking every single day until the day I die, because I am so desperate.
The things that will destroy us are: politics without principle; pleasure without conscience; wealth without work; knowledge without character; business without morality; science without humanity; and worship without sacrifice. ~ Mohandas K. Gandhi

Monday, July 18, 2011

1,200 Days And Nights


Today is Nelson Mandela day. I doubt that I could write anything about Nelson Mandela that hasn't been written a million times before, by far better writers than myself. I deeply admire this man, and all his accomplishments despite the adversity he faced. I honor him this day.I wish I was the right type of a personality to get mad, have a temper tantrum, scream and shout... be angry. But I'm not. I take all feelings, stresses, fears and hide them away. Once in a while I may get short with someone who is hounding me or being difficult, but it takes an awful lot to get a reaction out of me. Someone has to be insufferable for me to react. When under stress I internalize it.
For the past 1,200 days and nights I have faced a veritable nightmare each time I opened my eyes, and it's dogged me through each day. For the first two years it was court trials and investigations, frantically trying to locate the stolen building fund. The rest of the time it's been trying to find the stolen building fund or circumvent that need by finding another route. Trying to do the impossible.
As yet I have not heard a word about the electrical problems, so I don't know if it's going to be possible to get electricity to the land with the finances I have. The fear of not being able to get a home and get our lives back together is making me into a nervous wreck and I can't find relief.

On Saturday afternoon the minimum monthly payment allowed by the court arrived. $450 and some change. It is an absolute travesty of justice, an insult to injury for it doesn't change our situation in the least. My health is so bad that in an attempt to stop the migraines and chest pains yesterday I made the decision that for 24 hours I would refuse to think about, or worry about our home and barn. I was going to take Sunday off work, relax, catch up on sleep, watch a movie - and never even allow myself to think of a home and barn, my mother, my career, the economy or anything else that would bring on those awful chest pains and migraines. I prayed that it would rain to give me an excuse to take time to stop fretting and worrying, but the rain didn't come despite the clouds that came over the Sierra Blanca.

Still, it actually went quite well. Each time my mind wondered back to the land, the house or anything else I went for a walk and focused on something else. Until daylight went and I tried to watch a movie and fall asleep..

I have now been awake for 24 hours. No matter how much I tried too fall asleep the night terrors, chest pains and migraine returned with a vengeance,and the damp weather made it terribly cold.

1,200 days is an unGodly length of time to allow any woman to be homeless, frantically trying to locate a stolen building fund in a recession. Yet I understand that I have not gone through a fraction of the sheer unadulterated torment that Dorothy McKeever was put through by Robert Huckins and the judicial system. When you add up the pain and suffering that so many women were subjected to it is simply incomprehensible ... and inexcusable, and the mere thought that a builder can steal the only home women own, yet be allowed to live in comfort in his own home should make us cringe with shame.Again I plead to the family members of Robert Huckins to intervene. If that be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. If you would be caring enough, and humane enough to do so, please make your brother, son, cousin return the entire building fund he stole from us so that I can buy a home. I simply can't go on homeless. It is already July 2011 and my nerves are in shambles after over 3 years of hell that should never have been allowed. I am devastated at the loss of my mother, my career, our home. I am totally lost at who else to turn to because everything else has failed. You are my last hope. All I want is what we have paid honest money for, a home. So that this nightmare can be ended and we can get our family back together again - I beg for your mercy for there is no way I can survive any more of this.
They hang the man and flog the woman, Who steals the goose from off the common, Yet let the greater villain loose, who steals the common from the goose. ~ 17th century English protest rhyme