Friday, September 30, 2011

Once You Are In A Pickle

You can't go back to being a cucumber...

I was so deathly ill when I opened my eyes this morning. The migraine that sent me to bed yesterday gained strength during the night and was waiting to hit me between the eyes at sunrise. I sat perplexed at what to do to stop this constant illness. I am so exhausted. By noon the pain was at least tolerable even if uncomfortable.

It was also bitter cold when I got out of bed. Not a dry cold, but a bone chilling cold. I looked at the thermometer and it registered slightly over 40 degree's outside - which means that it was in the lower 30's inside this garden shed.
By 9 am it had got to 50 degree's but I was still shivering cold.

A prospective buyer e-mailed me so before 8 am I phoned Jan to relate the information and we discussed the electricity - again - and how to stop me from dying from hypothermia this coming winter. Dying doesn't worry me for I would consider that a blessing. Being in pain does.

The electricity is starting to cause more chaos and confusion than even I dare anticipate. Because of the delay in finding an electrician the fee's have increased considerably.
Otero County Electric seem to have been told that the funds came from donations. I paid those funds from an advance on my wages while I was still battling through criminal court trials.

One of the hardest things about this situation is battling through the gossip, innuendo's repeated by those who don't know any facts. When someone steals your building fund it isn't only the money that has disappeared.


In my case there were sub-contractors left unpaid, one intending to put a lien on the property. I was faced with no building permits, no inspections.. no electricity, a septic tank half installed and everything was coming down on my head at one time. I can't even pretend to have any construction skills or knowledge - so I was literally thrown under a bus.

So today I fund out that I would have to start all over again from square one and re-apply for permits to get electricity. And probably pay an increased installation fee, than the $3,000 I have already paid. And this doesn't even start to include the costs of the poles, terminals, meters, and a certified electrician. It never ends. It was already going to cost more than Robert Huckins is repaying me per YEAR. My stomach is churning over with anxiety fearing what the new cost is going to be. And here we are, going into October...
Again I appeal to the Huckins family members I am aware of, Malcolm Huckins, Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) What happened to Dorothy McKeever was inexcusable, and not one person would speak up for her. What happened to myself and my family no different. Your brother, cousin, son, Robert Huckins, stole our building fund knowing that once it was hidden we wouldn't even have the funds to rent a home.

He walked out of the Wells Fargo Bank on Sudderth Drive with $110,000 DAYS before the White Collar Crime investigators, for the State of New Mexico, demanded that he repay ALL of our building fund back within a 30 day period. The money disappeared into thin air, even though days later he was recorded in a deposition admitting that he had the money, adding that he didn't need 30 days to repay the money back, he could pay it back in less time.

Officer John Barnes of the state police was present during that deposition. Someone knows where our building fund is. And the people who know where it is are perfectly aware of the damage they are doing. There was much, much money collected from numerous victims than the amount of money recorded in this particular withdrawal from the Wells Fargo bank. And it wasn't spent on contracted jobs, because almost all employees and subcontractors were given hot checks. A number so large in dollar amount and numbers that it was impossible to account for them all.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


I can't physically go on being homeless and I want to see my mother. The 12th District Courts described this damage as "grievous." I would call it far more. Abuse above and beyond what any woman should be subjected to, let alone a victim of crime.
I implore you to intervene and make your brother, cousin, son, return ALL of the building fund that he stole so that we can have what you all have...
a home. I am begging for anyone to help me retrieve our home. We have paid for a home many, many times over both in finances and pain & suffering due to this continued this cruelty. I will keep asking every single day until the day I die, because I am so desperate, and I have no idea where else to turn. The survival of democracy depends on the renunciation of violence and the development of nonviolent means to combat evil and advance the good.~ A. J. Muste

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Home Is Where Your Journey Begins

The morning was simply gorgeous. Much warmer than usual, sunny.. just delightful. I woke up with a slight throb behind my right eye, and that awful feeling of a migraine settling in my stomach.

Seeing as I had so many errands to run today, that couldn't be delayed, I decided to start early, before the migraine made it impossible for me to function. Before noon the migraine intensified and went to both eyes.
I think I must have hauled a trailer the whole way to and from Nogal and never realized that I had one tire so low it was almost flat.
I know the migraines are stress and worry induced, but seeing as I cannot materialize a home & barn out of the clear blue sky I'm unsure how to keep them under control. I certainly can't add massive medical bills onto the damages I seem to be paying for.

Going by my property always rips my heart out of my chest and has an adverse effect on my health. It wouldn't take much for me to have a home and barn there, it wouldn't take a lot of money and it could be completed within days. It wouldn't be hard to get my life back to normal.

If... that dreaded word. IF.

If Robert Huckins would return all of the money he stole from us this nightmare would end almost overnight.

If.


But he refuses.

By the time I was back in Alto I was violently ill and crawled back into the shed to take some pain medication and sleep for a few hours. It may rain tonight.. I pray it does.

If home is where your journey begins could anyone tell me how it ends for the homeless?
Sometimes I wonder if I will ever find anyone who cares. Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, Michael Huckins, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) Anyone who may know where our building fund is hidden, or anyone who may help retrieve it. I am praying that one of you can speak to your cousin, brother, son and appeal to him to return the building fund he stole from us.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

While it was 24 degrees below zero outside you were all in warm homes. I was outside with no heat. While your lives have gone on uninterrupted. While your lives have gone on as normal, my family, my career, our lives have been irreparably shattered. I have not been able to see my mother since she came to Ruidoso to buy a home in 2007. We have tried every means to go on without the stolen money. But we can't obtain a home and restore our family unless it is returned. I implore, I beg as I have never begged before, I am begging for mercy. Please get Robert Huckins to return what wasn't his to take. What was our legal property. What we desperately needed to put a roof over our heads. To have a home. No-one should be so cruel and callous to steal someone's home and leave women homeless and desperate.
Most people, no doubt, when they espouse human rights, make their own mental reservation about the proper application of the word "human." ~ Suzanne Lafollette

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

The Warmth of A Home

The temperature started to drop into the low 40's (30's inside this shed) last night and I had a difficult time sleeping, frequently waking up cold and uncomfortable.

My mind kept going back to a warm home, the radiating warmth a family home gives that we often take for granted - until we don't have a home anymore.The soft lighting, the fire glowing. The smell of dinner cooking. The ability to be in a comfortable warm place of security looking out onto a cold world.
It becomes such a different world when you lose that security. When there is no home to shelter you and give you a reprieve.
It's a privilege to have books on a bookshelf, within reach. To have clean sheets and fresh smelling bedding. To be able to turn on a lamp, or cook a hot meal. To have clean clothes. To have family and friends in your home making and sharing memories. These are all unavailable to the homeless, so we are left with memories of days gone by. And the cold harsh reality of today. A reality that is simply terrifying me.
By sunrise the start of a beautiful day appeared over the horizon. I had a slight migraine but not bad enough to incapacitate me. By 10 am the migraine was starting in earnest and I had to take a couple of pain killers to try and restrain it. By noon it had disappeared and I don't welcome it back. Today was a slow easy day, but tomorrow is going to be a different story.
There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie
( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that our money would be returned before harm came to us.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.

Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.
We frail humans are at one time capable of the greatest good and, at the same time, capable of the greatest evil. Change will only come about when each of us takes up the daily struggle ourselves to be more forgiving, compassionate, loving, and above all joyful in the knowledge that, by some miracle of grace, we can change as those around us can change too.~Mairead Maguire

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Cardboard Testimony

The morning started in fine form, the farrier arrived to shoe No-Name and my youngest daughter had some good medical news pertaining to her dental problems.

An individual active in homelessness in the USA sent me an e-mail which simply read: Hang in there, though. Sometimes surprisingly fortunate, even miraculous things happen too. I wish I had his optimism as the 4th year of being homelessness approaches, but I sincerely appreciated his optimism.

Almost October. I have heard not a word from the electrician but I am praying with diligence that I can ... if nothing else, get the utilities working on the land before the weather turns.
This is nerve shattering..
Today was a day of running errands, and what started as a beautiful sunny day in the lower 80's soon became overcast in the afternoon. By the time I walked back into this shed it was..... full of flies. Hundreds of them. Why do they not all die off when it turns cold?
In the early evening I had the saddening task of trying to find out if the living room furniture is getting mildewed in the flooded tack room. It is. I walked away heartbroken not knowing what to do to protect my belongings... but not wanting to even start seeking a resolve until tomorrow.

For two years, while we went through the criminal court case, I had everything inside storage units but the costs for both myself and my family was literally exorbitant.

Ever since I took everything out of storage I have turned into the cardboard queen, packing, repacking, repacking again and again and again. But what to do about fine quality upholstery is simply beyond me. Cardboard isn't enough.
Again I appeal to the Huckins family members I am aware of, Malcolm Huckins, Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) What happened to Dorothy McKeever was inexcusable, and not one person would speak up for her. What happened to myself and my family no different. Your brother, cousin, son, Robert Huckins, stole our building fund knowing that once it was hidden we wouldn't even have the funds to rent a home.

He walked out of the Wells Fargo Bank on Sudderth Drive with $110,000 DAYS before the White Collar Crime investigators, for the State of New Mexico, demanded that he repay ALL of our building fund back within a 30 day period. The money disappeared into thin air, even though days later he was recorded in a deposition admitting that he had the money, adding that he didn't need 30 days to repay the money back, he could pay it back in less time.

Officer John Barnes of the state police was present during that deposition. Someone knows where our building fund is. And the people who know where it is are perfectly aware of the damage they are doing. There was much, much money collected from numerous victims than the amount of money recorded in this particular withdrawal from the Wells Fargo bank. And it wasn't spent on contracted jobs, because almost all employees and subcontractors were given hot checks. A number so large in dollar amount and numbers that it was impossible to account for them all.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


I can't physically go on being homeless and I want to see my mother. The 12th District Courts described this damage as "grievous." I would call it far more. Abuse above and beyond what any woman should be subjected to, let alone a victim of crime.
I implore you to intervene and make your brother, cousin, son, return ALL of the building fund that he stole so that we can have what you all have...
a home. I am begging for anyone to help me retrieve our home. We have paid for a home many, many times over both in finances and pain & suffering due to this continued this cruelty. I will keep asking every single day until the day I die, because I am so desperate, and I have no idea where else to turn.

The greatest minds are capable of the greatest vices as well as of the greatest virtues.~ Rene Descartes

Monday, September 26, 2011

I Wish I Could Just "Go Away."

Not being able to sleep all night for worrying knocked me off base today. I don't know why everything came pressing down on me, but it did and it went from fretting to anxiety attacks while I tossed and turned until 5.30 am Monday morning.
I had a bright idea that if I put a very interesting movie in the DVD player I would fall asleep... and it worked like a charm. But I woke up at 8 am feeling like I had been dragged through a hedge backwards.

Billy phoned to say that he was coming to shoe No-Name early tomorrow morning, and Jan phoned to discuss the video tapes of the horses.. all while I was walking around still half asleep tripping over my own tongue.

If I was scared of the unknown there would be a multitude of platitudes that could be used. But I am scared of what I know only too well. A hardship and adversity that is so inhumane that I question my ability to physically or emotionally withstand it anymore.

It is a lot easier to prevent abuse against women than to try and resolve it. Women should never have to fear becoming victims of this type of social predator because the laws cannot control the criminal. Society should be able to control the behavior of law breakers with anti-social tendencies. That is what civilized societies do. Protect the innocent.
No matter how much abuse I have had to withstand in the past 3+ years I have only ever asked for, what is OUR legal property. All of the damages; the damage to our property, the emotional, psychological and physical damages I never even put into the equation because the sole focus was getting into a home, getting a warm comfortable home and the barn finished. Not seeking retribution. I think God is perfectly capable of handling the judgment - of myself and others.

I can't even get "that" far, even though my begging & pleading started well before Robert Huckins walked out of the Wells Fargo Bank on Sudderth with $110,000 in cash - and that money was never seen again.
I have questioned why so many victims felt that it would be too stressful or embarrassing to try and get their money back. Yet I'll have to admit that had I the means to get a home I may have done exactly that. Go on with my life and not have the desire to waste my time. For example: If I was going to devote 10 minutes a day writing a blog I would much prefer it to be business related - not borne out of sheer desperation and anxiety. But in my case simply "going away" wasn't an option because there are no other means to get a home. I am homeless, and will remain homeless until Huckins returns the money he stole. That is ALL I have EVER asked for, it's all Dorothy McKeever ever asked for. Is that too much for women to ask for?

And all of this is happening during the worst recession we have seen in a century. So I won't go away and that reality just breaks my heart, because when the temperatures plummet Robert & Sylve Huckins will be in a warm home... and it's starting to look like I will be... still writing this blog.

The World Prays For An Economic Miracle

Saturday, 24 September 2011

After an incredibly volatile day on world markets, the head of the International Monetary Fund, Christine Lagarde, warned of a looming "collapse in global demand" which threatens to push economies around the world into a new recession.

"Dark clouds over Europe and huge uncertainty in the United States" mean that "the challenge could not be more urgent", she told politicians and leading economists in Washington, who are meeting there in an attempt to tackle the world's economic woes.

Calling for immediate action to support global growth and stabilise the international financial sector, Ms Lagarde said: "The actions I am calling for today are not for the coming years – they are for the coming months."

The stark warning followed the failure of the G20 group of leading economies to convince investors that they would avert a new global banking crisis. A communiqué from G20 finance ministers and central bank governors pledging to "take all necessary action to preserve the stability of banking systems and financial markets" failed to deliver a significant lift to investor sentiment. Stock markets in Europe and the US picked up slightly by the close of trading yesterday, but generally failed to recover the large losses experienced earlier in the week.

The Chancellor, George Osborne, who is in Washington for the IMF summit, attempted to ratchet up the pressure on his European counterparts, warning that they had six weeks to agree on radical measures to address the eurozone sovereign debt crisis before the next G20 meeting in November in Cannes. "There is now a quite clear deadline set which is the Cannes summit," he said. "The eurozone has six weeks to resolve this political crisis." The Chancellor claimed that European finance ministers are finally waking up to the fact that they must act faster to resolve the Continental debt crisis, saying that the "leading lights of the eurozone are aware of the fact that time [is] running out for them".

The G20 communiqué had sought to reassure financial markets that prompt action would be taken to ensure that all banks have sufficient capital buffers to absorb any economic shocks.

It said: "We will ensure that banks are adequately capitalised and have sufficient access to funding to deal with current risks."

But no new plan to inject capital into the Continent's fragile financial sector was announced. The IMF claimed this week that there is a potential €200bn-hole in the balance sheets of European banks as a consequence of strains in the European sovereign debt market.

And Ms Lagarde repeated her call for European leaders to act quickly to strengthen the balance sheets of their banks. A move by the credit rating agency Moody's to further downgrade eight Greek banks underlined the stresses in the Continent's financial sector.

The G20 communiqué also promised that the powers of the eurozone's emergency stabilisation fund, the EFSF, will be significantly boosted by the time of the Cannes meeting, enabling it to recapitalise banks and increase emergency lending to troubled states.

But that is dependent on national parliaments sanctioning an increase in the EFSF's powers. The German Bundestag will vote on the measures on 29 September. The German Chancellor, Angela Merkel, is facing problems convincing her Christian Democrat Party and her coalition partners, the Free Democrats, to back the legislation.

Despite instructing European leaders to take radical action in the face of the looming economic emergency, Mr Osborne refused to budge from his own radical deficit-reduction strategy. The Chancellor rejected claims he is contributing to the deficiency of global demand with his determination to wipe out the bulk of the UK's budget deficit by the end of this parliament. "This is a debt crisis. You can't separate debt and demand," he said. "They are intricately linked. Unless you deal with debt you can't deal with demand."

The Chancellor also stressed that, despite his opposition to the UK ever joining the single currency, it is in Britain's national interest for the eurozone to survive the present crisis: "I'm very clear that a break-up of the euro is bad for Britain ... It is in Britain's interest that the euro works, that it's stable."

Although Britain is not in the eurozone, the British banking sector is significantly exposed to turmoil in the currency bloc. A stress test of Europe's banks in July by the European Banking Authority showed that the Royal Bank of Scotland, Barclays and HSBC have extended loans amounting to €204bn to governments and companies in troubled eurozone nations.

If the single currency were to collapse, British banks would register large losses on those loans. Despite rising fears about the health of European banks, Mr Osborne yesterday insisted that British banks are perfectly safe: "UK banks are well capitalised and liquid."

There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that our money would be returned before harm came to us.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylve Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW, and you knew what your son had done to them.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning, $45,000 from Francis McKinney, $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.The meaning of good and bad, of better and worse, is simply helping or hurting. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sunday, September 25, 2011

People With Homes Dream Of Being Homeless

The sunrise was simply spectacular this morning. All of the pine trees
burnt a bright red from the reflection of the sun coming on the horizon. Yesterday I was so ill I could barely do anything but market a few horses, and sleep. The physical pain was so chronic I slept as a means to evade it, but even opening my eyes became problematic.
I still have heard a word from the electrician, but I still have heard a word from the horse shoer either. I have been told that "No-Name" may be sent to the racetrack to be used as a pony horse, and that may be the best thing for him. He's gained 300 lbs and has risen from the ashes of a skeleton into a healthy and very bulky Quarter Horse with muscles rippling down his legs. He needs something to do. He needs to work.

The swelling on Gracie's face has finally gone away, and the allergy that was affecting Rio decreased considerably after Becky gave her the anti-allergy shot. Everyone is in good shape.. except me.

The weather was simply gorgeous all day, but I continued to be ill. I am frustrated not only with my inability to get into a home, but my declining health, and the lack of energy I have that would be required to keep fighting on. From December 2007 until September 2011 has been too long, too hard and I can't seem to find the hope needed.
I am just so exhausted from being stressed, cold, wet, anxious I don't want anymore of this..
Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy.

I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins retu
rns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless.

Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen our building fund I wouldn't be making this plea today.

But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention. Non-cooperation is a measure of discipline and sacrifice, and it demands respect for the opposite views.~ Mohandas K. Gandhi

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Social Category Of People

I was frozen when I woke up this morning and my body is feeling the adverse effects of the colder damp nights in this shed. I think it only got down to 50 outside, but inside this dark cold shed it was 15 degree's colder. Even after 9 am, when it reached 60 degrees, I just couldn't get warm no matter what I did.

I started to become ill early yesterday evening and spent the entire night fighting a violent migraine. This has been a really bad night and today I am in excruciating pain. My hips, spine and neck feel as though I am being physically tortured.

I have days when I hurt so much, staying in this shed is such a hardship to my body that I just can't handle it anymore. This is one of those days.

Even though I was ill last night I tried to go through the boxes of belongings which have been tossed around due to homelessness. I don't have a family photograph left. Last night I threw out the remaining photographs of my daughters as babies and little girls which had become so mildewed they could not be saved. It's heartbreaking. Continued abuse.
Homelessness is the condition and social category of people without a regular house or dwelling because they cannot afford, do not desire, or are otherwise unable to maintain regular, safe, and adequate housing, or lack "fixed, regular, and adequate nighttime residence. ...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homelessness
It would have been simply hilarious to think that any woman could spend $140,000 and find themselves in a "Social Category Of People" had it not been true. This is so bizarre you couldn't make it up and sell it as fiction, not even as a horror story.

What Does It Mean to Be Homeless?

While the experience of each homeless individual varies, here are some examples of what homelessness means to many of them:

Homelessness means:

Having little or no privacy.

Regularly being questioned about your activities, at least once a week.

Needing to hide your living space.

Being separated from family members.

Receiving rejection and hostility from most people.

Trying to get into a home, but you haven’t been able to.

Having your possessions stolen or ruined on a regular basis.

Spending more time giving up than hoping.

Today the weather is simply gorgeous but I am still so ill all I want to do is sleep, "spend more time giving up than hoping"... isn't that the truth!


Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy.

I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins retu
rns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless.

Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen our building fund I wouldn't be making this plea today.

But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.

Humility is the solid foundation of all virtues.~ Confucius

Friday, September 23, 2011

The Honesty Factor

I don't think we could have had a nicer autumn morning. Just the prettiest morning even though I was having a difficult time warming my feet. It soon became a picture perfect day.

As soon as I learned that someone else was picking the colt up in Texas I gave a sigh of relief. I used to love hauling the horses interstate, but today all of my joints hurt too much to be sat behind the wheel of a rig for hours.
Fridays are always slow for me. The horse shoer was supposed to arrive.. but never did. I checked on my youngest daughter to make sure she was as good as can be expected under the circumstances and ran to Ruidoso to pick up some cleaning supplies.

The instability in the present economy is the worst I have ever seen, and I have gone through some recessions that hit the horse industry very hard.
Because I see the total destructive nature of dishonest behavior, because I feel the lack of caring for the victims of crime, it didn't surprise me at all to read this article in the Christian Monitor.

The Honesty Factor In Reviving The Economy

Researchers who study honesty in societies have just found a gold mine of virtue in Japan.

In the seven months since an earthquake and tsunami destroyed entire Japanese communities, some $78 million in cash has been found in the piles of debris. Most was returned to the rightful owners. In one case, as reported by the Los Angeles Times, a woman found a purse with $26,000 in yen notes and turned it in.

Japan’s culture of honesty is well known and helps account for that country’s past economic success. In Tokyo,experiments are often conducted by leaving wallets filled with cash around the city and then counting how many wallets are returned, along with the money. The numbers are astonishingly high.

Such lessons in honesty are important as America and Europe try to recover from their economic woes. In large part, those woes were caused by giant lapses in honesty.

In America’s case, the recent housing bubble was driven in part by people who lied about their finances to obtain home mortgages or who knew they had little chance of paying them back. Equally bad, these “liar’s loans” were then knowingly sold to investors by agents who knew such mortgages were “toxic.” Even now, many banks are reluctant to admit the real value of their mortgage assets – a big uncertainty that hangs over financial markets.

In Europe, the great fib occurred in Greece. It cooked its books on its fiscal deficit.

When it joined the euro community over a decade ago, Greece promised to follow the rule of not letting its deficit exceed 3 percent of its gross domestic product. But it lied to foreign investors, such as French banks. Its deficit was three times that amount.

Fortunately, when George Papandreou became prime minister in 2009, he exposed the lie. And he has worked to restore transparency in Greece’s accounting.

A similar cleansing is under way in the United States as the 2010 Dodd-Frank Act forces both homeowners and the mortgage industry to become more open and honest about borrowing. Those liar loans, for example, are disappearing with the law’s requirement that agents who bundle mortgages for investors must retain at least 5 percent of the assets.

Honesty is a key measure of the “social capital” essential to a healthy economy. Numerous studies show successful economies rely on people going beyond simply being honest out of fear of being caught or because of incentives to be honest. “Unselfish” honesty in which people act out of principle is also significant. It leads to more personal cooperation and fewer legal contracts. It allows greater efficiency and creativity.

Using the World Values Survey, researchers find a direct link between economic well-being and a society’s level of trust between individuals. In the US, trustworthiness has been in decline over recent decades, according to studies.

While more regulation may force honest behavior in the economy, it can also burden progress by creating disincentives for creating new jobs and new businesses. A proper balance is needed.

America and Europe must work harder on their “honesty deficit” as well as solve the more obvious economic problems. Japan’s post-tsunami display of honesty is a reminder of how much that virtue is a glue for society as well as a driver for growth.

http://www.csmonitor.com/Commentary/the-monitors-view/2011/0923/The-honesty-factor-in-reviving-the-economy

The only thing left for me to do is to plead to the family members of Robert Huckins to intervene. If that be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. If you would be caring enough, and humane enough to do so, please make your brother, son, cousin return the entire building fund he stole from us so that I can buy a home. I simply can't go on homeless. It is already September 2011 and my nerves are in shambles after over 3 years of hell, that should never have been allowed. I am devastated at the loss of my mother, my career, my home and all I want is what we have paid honest money for - and I beg for your mercy.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention. The conception of worth, that each person is an end per se, is not a mere abstraction. Our interest in it is not merely academic. Every outcry against the oppression of some people by other people, or against what is morally hideous is the affirmation of the principle that a human being as such is not to be violated. A human being is not to be handled as a tool but is to be respected and revered. [From: An Ethical Philosophy of Life] ~Felix Adler

Thursday, September 22, 2011

First Day Of Autumn

I was up all night tossing, turning, worrying and eventually that turned to chest pains and migraine in short order. Just before sunrise I became exhausted enough to fall asleep, but that meant that I didn't even start to wake up until well after 9 am.
Going into a 4th winter of homelessness has worn me down. I have become the invisible person, with invisible pain, invisible fear, invisible being. In fact - I am no longer a human being, and I am more than aware of that reality.

I promised myself that I would try to get out more, start trail riding, get out more and be with friends, become pro-active doing what I love to do instead of being solely focused on getting a home ~ but I seem not to be able to break away from this intense desire to get into a home and restore what was stolen.I put in a short work day today and this afternoon I tried to start cleaning my belongings that were caught in the constant flooding that comes through the foundation of this shed.

To say that it is a mess is a slight understatement. Maybe this is payback for always being house proud. I couldn't even stand a pillow out of place... today I am shoveling mud from around my bed. A losing battle with mold, mildew, damaged property, heart ache, heartbreak, anxiety, cold, damp and a very unsavory lifestyle.
And this cost us $140,000 to acquire?

My youngest daughter, hospitalized with MRSA, has now been diagnosed with Osteomyelitis.
I didn't know if I should start to scream, pull my hair out or throw myself on the mercy of God.. but I did all three. Please God, do these people not understand that there is enough adversity in life without deliberately, with premeditated malice, throw a woman into a homeless situation..
There has to be someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us so that I can buy a home and get our lives back.
I don't believe I have EVER witnessed any none violent crime that can be as devastating as stealing someone's home. I am walking in Dorothy McKeevers f
ootsteps, day by day, month by month, year by year.

Liam Griffin, I sat in your law office with two witnesses as you gave me your promise, your guarantee, that our money would be returned before harm came to us.

Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins you were present the day I signed contract with your son. You walked out of the kitchen with Sylvi Huckins and your son introduced me to you. He told you that I was the British horse trainer he had told you about, the one he was going to build the home and barn for. Why didn't you say something? There may be a rational and reasonable explanation but I have spent over 3 years, homeless, not understanding it. I understand it even less knowing that though I was a total stranger, both Dorothy McKeever and Sally Canning you KNEW.

Dr. Kenneth Ogilvie, I contacted you and simply asked for a reference, not knowing that Robert Huckins was your cousin. Robert Huckins had just stolen over $30,000 from the domestic violence shelter, HEAL, yet everyone was trying to hide it. There was a history of stealing large amounts of money. $65,000 PLUS from Nancy Canning. $89,000 PLUS from Dorothy McKeever. The list just goes on and on and on.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.


Women are not banks or loan institutions. Women should not be the source of a retirement fund for people who don't want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Holding women hostage while playing with the judicial system, a horrendous game of cat and mouse extending YEARS, with the victims whose very homes, families and stability are in jeopardy is cruelty, as cruel as a physical beating. It is financial and emotional RAPE. Homelessness is not justice. It is a slow, painful death.
Please, I beg with everything I have within me, please convince
Robert Huckins to stop this torture and return the building fund he stole from us so we too, can have a home.Respect for the fragility and importance of an individual life is still the mark of an educated man.~ Norman Cousins

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Last Of The Summer Wine

And... the last day of summer 2011.

I woke up this morning feeling like I had been beaten with a baseball bat the entire night. The tumors and joints in my body felt like I would never be able to lift my head, or take a step, ever again. The pain was unbearable.Even though it was 8.30 am, I truly thought it was around 6 am. I kept looking at the temperature on the computer, 45 degree's... but it felt like it was way down into the 20's inside this garden shed.
No-one said a word about hauling the race colt from Texas, and seeing as I didn't even wake up until 8.30 am in so much pain I wasn't going to broach the subject either. Instead I played catch up on the work I should do, but can't do, because of illness.

The weather turned simply fabulous after 11 am. As I pulled into Harvey's Feed & Ranch Supplies it started to rain. BIG drops of rain. While the truck was being loaded the rain turned to an incredible hail storm. It was coming down so fast and so furious that within minutes Highway 70 was flooding.
Driving back towards Alto through this deluge made me wonder how I was going to get a Ford250 to the horse corrals. In this type of weather I needed the heavier Ford350 not a lightweight city truck. But right before the racetrack I literally drove out of the hail storm into glorious weather.
But by 6 pm the thunder could be heard in the distance, promising a night of rain.

Still, it was a really pretty day and I managed to get quite a bit accomplished - even if I didn't pick up the race colt.

Yesterday was my bosses 87th birthday, reminding me how fragile my situation is. That I am on borrowed time. I still not have heard a word from the electrician and my nerves are unraveled. I desperately need the home I purchased... I can't go on homeless, it is so inhumane and cruel.
The only thing left for me to do is to plead to the family members of Robert Huckins to intervene. If that be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins. If you would be caring enough, and humane enough to do so, please make your brother, son, cousin return the entire building fund he stole from us so that I can buy a home. I simply can't go on homeless. It is already September 2011 and my nerves are in shambles after over 3 years of hell, that should never have been allowed. I am devastated at the loss of my mother, my career, my home and all I want is what we have paid honest money for - and I beg for your mercy.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention.

I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity. ~ Albert Einstein

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Being On the Outside, Looking In

I was up before sunrise after having a miserable night trying to stop a violent migraine. My stomach was still queasy, terribly sick to my stomach, but the pain in my eyes wasn't severe enough to stop me from working. I thank God because I had a full and hectic day ahead of me.

It felt so cold, my feet were like blocks of ice, and again I found myself stood in the dark chilly morning air on the outside of warm comfortable homes around me... looking in.

Is it autumn yet? It certainly feels like it, but once the sun rose the morning was simply gorgeous. As soon as I walked outside the deer came galloping up already licking their lips in anticipation of stealing the sweet feed put out for the horse.
I telephoned my daughter to see how she was doing, then set about to see if I could make a semblance of organization in the chaos of packed belongings.

This afternoon I had to run to Capitan to see Becky Washburn, pick up supplies at Lincoln County Mercantile Farm & Ranch, and head to the Lazy J Ranch.

The plan was to try and get as much done as possible in one day, so I could be free for the drive to Lamesa, Texas, to pick up the race colt. But only after 6.30 pm was I told that tomorrow is going to be "iffy." I may go, I may not go.
I don't want to drive to Texas, so I am hoping the haulers will get there first. The migraine I thought was under control this morning started to escalate through the day and I need to sleep...

Someone related to Robert & Sylve Huckins must have some means to reach them, if it be Michael Huckins, Dr.Kenneth Ogilvie ( Diana Huckins? Dominic Huckins? Malcolm Huckins? ) or Patricia Ogilvie-Huckins and get them to return ALL of the money they stole from us. I, like those victims who came before me, have been dragged through a living hell and I simply beg for your mercy.

I can't obtain a home until Robert Huckins retu
rns the money he stole from us that was to buy a home, and I can't remain homeless.

Had he given the money back when he promised the white collar crime investigators I wouldn't be making this plea today. Had he never stolen our building fund I wouldn't be making this plea today.

But he pushes the abuse and torment to an extent where no alternatives are offered.

Today Robert Huckins has his own home...
He also has OUR home.....
He also has a lot of people's money...
And his freedom.

No women should be abused to this degree. I am homeless and I want to see my mum and return to my career, so I won't stop asking if I have to ask every single day until I die. Robert Huckins gave no-one an alternative, so I plead with sincerity for your mercy and intervention. Greed is a fat demon with a small mouth and whatever you feed it is never enough.~ Janwillem van de Wetering