Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Closed Doors! Where are the Open Windows?

I'm sure that many people have gone through periods where every single door is closed and you become so confused where you are supposed to go, or what you are supposed to do.

My daughter's major criticism of their mother has, for years, been: "Stop expecting everyone to think like you do."

I always assume that people mean well. Perhaps it's my raising. My father would quietly tell me, "Evil thinks as evil does." He was wrong. Evil is around us and we simply can't expect everyone to have honest and honorable intentions.

Some have emotional problems, they may come into your life like an angel of light only to lie, steal and deceive. Not all are blatant thieves like Huckins.

Today I am sat watching an 85 yr old man handle such a person. A person who wants to bully, control and manipulate. One minute bringing gifts, doing wonderful acts of kindness. The next spitting venom or doing unbelievable acts of viciousness. Legal and moral just seem like lost causes. It is their way, or they will bring total destruction.

Having felt the wrath I keep a distance, but it's difficult for me. To watch a deeded right of way closed because someone knows the owner is too old and ill to fight you, the oneupmanship, the continual bullying confuses me no end.

I have an infuriating habit of trying to understand why a human being would end up this malevolent, this unhealthy, when my daughter's are 100% accurate. "Beware of Greeks bearing gifts." -Aeneid

A minister was kind enough to speak with me and pray for me. His words allowed me to TRY to stop focusing on the problems and seeing them as problems. So here I am trying to lay it all at the foot of the cross - prayerfully I will be able to let go of self and leave it there. I have not done very well handling it alone. The question "How it is working for you?" is echoing through my ears.

A home, a horse facility, my mother, and the desire to open an equine therapy program for the military and local teens. It all seemed possible 3 years ago, today it seems so impossible. Yet with God ALL is possible.

Yesterday I went to the Lazy J and watched Honey, aka, "Bugs Flight" come in from a trail ride. She's a sweet girl and she will make a wonderful therapy horse.

Lord, Please open the doors I need to go through and close those not of your will, and please Heavenly Father, spare me from Greeks bearing gifts.

Faith can move mountains, but don't be surprised if God hands you a shovel. ~Author Unknown